Confidence; wear it like make-up

; everyone in love

2010-01-07T00:16:00.002+08:00

“There’s A Place In
Your Heart
And I Know That It Is Love
And This Place Could
Be Much
Brighter Than Tomorrow
And If You Really Try
You’ll Find There’s No Need
To Cry
In This Place You’ll Feel
There’s No Hurt Or Sorrow”

If I would to find a genie in a lamp and if it was to grant me a wish , just one wish ; I wish that people start spreading the love and stop the hatred and things are back to where it was meant to be .

Stop being so typical by judging the person attributes and personalities when you know nothing about them , and than you place a mind set that first impression does count . Yes ; I do agree that first impression do wonders , but think again , you may never know what lies beneath a person’s facial expression when you first set eyes on them . You may never know why the put a long face to the world . You may never know why their face are covered with wrinkles . You are not them and they are not you . Have you ever at least try to make an effort to get to know them ?

Flaws and all . We have to learn to accept one another . God has individually design us in his own perspective and he place every different unique qualities in every creation . I keep on saying this ; you are insulting the work of Allah if you talk shit about a person . Yes ; in times when raging anger does you harm . Words tend to spit out like arrows flying across the bright sky , but when you think back ; deep down you feel a nauseous feeling of sheer guilt . It is never to easy to accept one flaws ; but what we learn and what we were taught must always be put into practice .

Patience my friends . Patience . That is what I am learning right now . I heard stories about me and my Pillars . This and that ; here and there . It hurts to know , yes it does but people all have their own judgments and I truly respect that . All I wish is that , evil eyes are thrust upon us and I wish they could actually realize that we are the same as them ; EQUAL in every single way .

We have flaws . So do you . We have curfews . So do you . We are human with feelings . So do you . If you ever think for a second that the words being drill in our minds will hurt us , than your aim is fulfill , but IF you ever think that it will bring us down ; than you better start doing some research because we grew much stronger than before .

Heal the world people . Spread some love . I think this is the right time .

yours truly ,

zimah

; This way . That way

2009-12-22T12:11:00.004+08:00

When it comes to the world ; everyone is equal . Each and every individual one of us are not living in some kind of a fantasy world . The world whereby you can expect sugary dreams and sweet tasting life . No , that is not it ; we are all stuck in reality . It is proven that every single one of us had a taste of being hit with obstacles ; but we overcome it . It is proven that every single one of us had a taste of love (universal term : family . friends . boyfriends . girlfriends) ; but even if hard times hit our shores , we still overcome it .

Judging by the little sentences that I make , I prefer living in reality that some kind of a fake shit fantasy , because you know why ? All this rough and tough matters that bump my way has actually mold me to become like this . You live and you learn . You cry and you giggle . You fall and you survive . That is how life is design . Accept it . Love it .

Let me end this by saying , life is short enough and holding and bearing grudges just makes you waste a second of your valuable time on Earth . Choose your paths wisely . Plus , think about other people . They are far worst than you . You may be on the edge of breaking down , but have you ever wonder what a person in Africa feels like with no food , no shelter no nothing ? If they have the strength to pull through all odds , I am sure people like us can too .

Insyaallah , ALLAH will guide us . Thank him for every obstacles he gave for at the end of the day , good times will be given for those who shows strength and patience to him .

Now I truly believe that the good things in life are for free . You see ; my girls mean the world to me , and we are like any others , having fun and doing what we love to do . Today was fill with so much laughter till my tummy hurts so badly . I love each and everyone of them . Plus SARA too .

Heeran Performance was awesome . We look like super heroes cum school girls . The first was off the chain but the second one we were having too much fun till we were laughing on stage .

It was all worthwhile , and now

I am waiting for the cheque to roll by Baby .

I fell in love with the flaws that my Pillars have . In my eyes , they are perfect enough for me . Even if the earlier part of the day was such misery due to unforeseen circumstances , we manage to calm our-self down and pull through this tough day together .

First up , Bee , Dinah , Liy , Sasha and Myself had a competition over at Mediacorp and seriously the place look so awesome when you actually venture to the insides , and oh wait a minute , I saw Sezairi and he smiled . How nice , I shall vote for him *giggles* . The competition was alright , we had endless fun plus the remix is so cute . Thank you Bee for finding all of the sound effects .

We rushed down to Redhill for rehearsals . The groups for the Finals are all tremandous and I got seriously nervous as hell . Than again , I was there for a purpose . To have fun with my girls , and showcase our god given talent to the people who came ; entertain them , we do not expect them to love what we do , but at the end of the day , we dance with our heart and that is all that matters .

No we did not clinch any placings . It is seriously alright , we gain knowledge , experience and a lot of new friends . Alhamdullilah for this . The after party was mayhem . I am in love with that and I wish to have more of those . Miss Riri booty-shake all out siah .

*giggles*

yours truly ,

zimah

; My girls

2009-12-18T12:52:00.003+08:00

Baby you're my everything, you're all i ever wanted
We could do it real big, bigger than you ever done it
You be up on everything, other hoes ain't ever on it
I want this forever, i swear i could spend whatever on it

Hate is such a huge load to weigh in so therefore for now , I shall use the term ; dislike . People are breathing on our necks , with sharp eyes piercing on our backs . The pressure was there but it never took the better of me or us . We were stronger than you can imagine and it took us such a little time to gather and collate everything into Plan B .

Costume hunting was seriously tiring as our mind were already fatigue just running around Town to find the perfect look for us . We were looking for sales here and there , up , down and everywhere . We did not gave up any hope and yes finally we found a nice look that suited our theme . What was awesome was the journey to Cine-leisure . We were all anticipating to lay our hands on our shades . Once we reach , we purchase our shades in Hot Pink . Yummy I must say .

Trudge back to Woodlands for practice and making of props . We call ourself the Cyclop Ladies as all seven of us wore the shades in the MRT . What was even smoking hot was we all sat in the same row so yes , we were being look-ed at . I find that today myself and Miss Perry is super crazy with our British Accent it was super hilarious though .

18 December 2009

Too lethargic I suppose . Till an extent that I slept at 11pm yesterday night . My backbone hurts to the maximum and I had the weirdest dreams of all time . Surreal and scary I must say and I was struggling to get myself out of the dreams .

Yesterday , practice again . Contemporary piece is already done . Alhamdullilah . Good job BRAHH’s . We re-polish everything up and yes I can feel the nervousness as I feel that my whole body was trembling suddenly . Insyaallah everything will be just fine .

On another note , I was elated cuz my favourite Boy called me twice before falling in . We talked about him booking out , the timings and what time should I fetch him and have our dinner either back at home or somewhere near . It was good listening to him . His voice just made my soul feel calm cuz’ now at least I know that he is doing good in camp .

I am lethargic now . I shall end here . GOOD LUCK to Miss Perry and Miss Hilson for results . YOU CAN DO IT BRAHH !

yours truly ,
zimah

; i love you

2009-12-16T01:56:00.002+08:00

Baby I dont know what it is but you drive me crazy and every time
Im around you boy it feels amazing and im on my best behavior
When im with my baby cuz I cant lose my baby
Lately when youre gone all I do is think about my baby,
im so gone off youre love and I dont know why baby
its the way you love me hold me kiss me cuz baby i

It is 02.01 in the morning and I have a couple of things to trace back and laugh upon . My tummy squeals in excitement just thinking about all those lame ass jokes that was shared earlier , plus a few moment ago , I sent a random video to BRAH Miss Perry and brainwashed her to have that guy as her future boyfriend . Like I say BRAH , he will serenade you to sleep and insomnia nights are no longer evident in your dictionary *giggles*

A dozen of lame ass jokes are keeping me giggling all of a sudden . Like the Kotex joke , the Condominium/Flat joke , the Fish Ball joke and many more . What a day ! To add on , Sasha’s horrific voice is haunting me . I doubt that I will be having a good night sleep later . *huge smile*

Meeting my Pillars tomorrow to get our costume for our competitions on Saturday . Note the S people ; yes we are having two competitions on the very same day . H20 at Mediacorp Studios and Dance Infinity at Redhill . Will be such a rush and hectic day for us , but we will pull through , I am sure of it .

On a side note , I have no clue why I kept on viewing my favourite boy Face-book page . I truly miss him . It is getting awkward and weird not having my phone to ring at this hour . However , I will persevere and get use to this treatment . He will be back in the blink of an eye . So let me work on my patience , this is truly a test for me and for us .

On another note , my gorgeous neighbour came by my house a couple of hours ago . We had the normal life catching up stories to share . I truly appreciate how she loves and support of me dancing . I love her life ; seriously , and I pray to God to guide her in her Exams tomorrow .

I think I shall end this here . I am sleepy-weepy ! Oh , I need to get back studying from next week onwards . 3 modules equals to 3 test when school re-opens and f.y.i I STILL HATE SCHOOL *giggles*

yours truly ,

zimah

; PEJAM KELIP

2009-12-15T00:01:00.004+08:00

I'm selfish cause I don't wanna share
him with nobody not even those
People that came before me
But see I never believe.

God sent me an angel up from above
Whose gonna love me for life
Might as well be perfect
Only because it's the only way
I can describe

My morning was simply a rush as my alarm clock did not went off on the specific time that I thought I had arrange . I was in beads of sweats when the time stared meanly back at me . It was 7 and I was suppose to meet up with my favourite boy at 8 . I was clashing and bumping into things and was jumping up and down with anxiety . For a second , I really thought that I was Wonder Woman in my past life . *giggles*

My favourite boy was booking in at 9 , and I do not work well under pressure ; That is how I am design . I got lost finding my way , I got up and down the same bus for like a couple of times till I gave up on hope and was planning to trudge back home with sadness fill in my system , but than Mama called and asked me to meet her and Ate at Tiong Bahru Plaza as they are heading back home to collect my favourite boy’s belonging . As stubborn as he could get ; he refuses to bring his belongings during Enlistment , and so Mama had to do everything .

Once done , we flagged a cab down to the Headquarters but now Richmond was there because he wants to meet his older brother for the last time . Since Mama and Ate has the pass for visit , me and Richmond had to present our Identification Card to enter . Our reason was to pass “our brother” his belongings , and Richmond was laughing and said ; “how can he be our brother , we have different names” , and I said ; “we have the same brother from another mother” , and Mama was laughing because of that .

We waited in the holding area and I saw a figure emerge from behind . I was filled with happiness and at the same time , I felt sadness rush over me . A lady told us that he had to go to his Unit over at Clementi now and we could go off already . Ate asked my favourite boy to gave me something , and he gave me a kiss in front of Mama . I am patiently waiting for you to come back on the 23rd Baby .

Had lunch and I have to say a big thank you to Mama for treating me . They were asking me to head down to Orchard with them but I had practice to run along . Mama was asking me about how Baby is and how he has been treating me . Mama told me her stories and I feel her pain , and I am praying that God showers her with never ending blessings .

After which went to practice . My decision is final . I shall keep my mouth shut .

My night was made into a splendid one when he called using his friend’s phone . I was beaming and I know he is too . His friends were chaotic and it made my day . Like I say Baby , I shall wait for you to book out and we shall spend the night away . My promises to you ; I shall keep it . National Service is tough , and I will do whatever it takes to lessen the load .

I am done =)

I miss my Baby , and I truly believe that if my heart and soul is strong , than his heart and soul will be too . =D Currently talking to Kaye darl . Kevin is in camp and when he is booking out , she will be flying off to France .

yours truly ,

zimah

; this ones for you

2009-12-14T00:12:00.002+08:00

But that's the moment you came to me
You don't know what your love has done to me
Think I'm invincible
I see though the me I used to be

You changed my whole life
Don't know what your doing to me with your love
I'm feeling all super human, you did this to me
A super human heart beats in me
Nothing can stop me here with you

What a Sunday I must say . I am lethargic ; seriously am . It is such a blessing on how accurate the one above shower me with my holidays at a time when I needed my rest the most . The morning was a rush , I got a text from my favourite boy and worry spreads through my veins just like a virus . Before hand I had to run some errands before catching up with my favourite boy and E-merged .

Since I miss out on FDC’s party the night before , I decided to head down to a suite that Ate Cherrie booked for E-merged and as I step into the suite , I imagine my life with my Pillars , and how cool it was to have a slumber party at that extravagant suite . Maybe the thought shall be discuss *smiles* . The day went by pretty awesome I must say . There were awesome movies back to back just to spend the time away . First it was ; Wanted , Second was ; Step Brothers and the last one was ; X-men . We watched it till the time that everyone had to check out

My favourite boy alongside with Carlo and Zad plus myself decided to head down for lunch at MacDonald’s . As usual , the both of us ordered Double Cheeseburger without pickles , with 2 mayonnaise and 3 curry sauce to go along . I text-ed Miss Riri asking about where she is heading , and they all decided to head down to a computer shop near Dhoby Ghaut to play Left 4 Dead 2 . Yes people ; I finally got my eyes set on Left 4 Dead 2 . My favourite boy was too engross in playing and it was rather amusing looking at how adorable he could get .

On a side note , I saw this nice robe for our contemporary piece . I envision how the three of us will look like on that particular day . Speaking of the competition , I am nervous about it . One of us just saw her work schedule and I am really nervous about it . Shall discuss with everyone tomorrow when we are in the circle .

I guess this is it , oh by the way , I got back my old laptop and it is really slow . Cannot wait to get my hands on my laptop on Thursday ! Patience baby patience . I shall use the laptop till the morning , because I am meeting my favourite boy at 8 in the morning as I am sending him to his Enlistment thing over at Queenstown if I am not mistaken .

So till here ;

pillars I miss you so

yours truly ,
zimah

; hold up wait

2009-12-12T23:42:00.003+08:00

I've been spending all my time
Just thinking about ya
I don't know where to
I think i'm fallin' for you
I've been waiting all my life
And now i found ya
I don't know where to
I think i'm fallin' for you
I'm fallin' for you

The phone began to rang and my sleep was disturbed , but it was all worth while . My favourite boy text message me asking me to accompany him to the building near Lavender to get his Identification Card done . Ask Mama for permission and despite knowing that the building was already by than close I still went on with my plans of meeting my favourite boy and my Girls to get back my camera . I was simply amaze by how quick I got change because Lavender and my place is like separated into two different sides of Singapore .

Upon reaching , as usual my heart began to beat fast whenever I locked eyes on him , and since the building was closed , we decided to take our time and walked to Beach Road to have my lunch . We had so much time to kill , so we sat down and he randomly took some pictures of himself . How adorable . Knowing the whereabouts of my Girls , we than took the train to City Hall . Supposingly the initial plan was to meet at Orchard but my favourite boy had some urgent matters to attend too *giggles* .

Since his prepaid was down , I helped called Jr , Zad and Ate Cherrie for him . It was hilarious moment for us because I had to say “Where are you” in Tagalog , and when I did , Jr and Zad replied me back in Tagalog and I was laughing so hard with confusion till I had to pass my phone to him . He than met up with Ate Cherrie for his Christmas Party with the Filipino Dance Club which I was suppose to attend too as well , but I had a family matter to go next .

Bus rides to my grand-parents home . Everyone was there and I came a little later . Abah said that he will present me with a 4gb Ipod Nano for my birthday , what’s more awesome is that , it will be in my favourite colour ; GREEN *huge smiles* . Well , I am not in my usual happy mood actually . Some stuff happen , I need to get my room clean . I want to go out in the morning to realese some tension .

Monday equals to sending my favourite boy to his Enlistment . Nervous much . Well till here .

yours truly ,

zimah

; I live to love

2009-12-10T23:23:00.001+08:00

You got me like The Roots & Erykah Badu
Trust me, it’s true, when I say that I want you
I need you and trust; there’s no questions about that
I’m ready to give you everything; there’s no looking back at
The past; love the fact that we can talk, when we just laughed
Do anything for you; no, you’ll never have to ask
Connect beyond the physical; it’s feeling metaphysical
Indescribable; beyond poetical or lyrical
I say I never miss you never gone from my mind
You’re the source of inspiration for every rhyme, every line
Every time that we spend always feels like the first date
Every kiss like the last, but you still make my knees shake
And how I get excited when I know that you’re callin’
I wanna type hi, when I see that you log in
Excited and nervous, and you’ve given me purpose
I wanna talk to you, but at the same time I’m wordless

I had a good day today ; seriously a good one . The atmosphere at home is pure wonderful and I have to thank God for that because no one ever wants to step into a secluded area with a bad vibe and what is worst is that , you are feeling seriously lethargic . Get the point ?

On a bright note , I had practices with the Pillars and it was a good one . The full squad was present only after 9 but it was all cool , polished up 3 songs and in my opinion , we have to give it all out and not let any time pass us by . This competition means a lot to me and to us . Not only that , we are also having our H20 competition on that very day , so I requested us to have the earlier slots so that we can rush down to Redhill for rehearsals .

Currently is having a chat with Miss Dinah Perry and she is randomly typing the lyrics to Milkshake . Random-cosity people .

Yes ; I am lethargic . So till here .

Holidays people !

yours truly ,

zimah

; excuse me while I kiss the sky

2009-12-09T11:44:00.002+08:00

Basta kita kasama, walang problema
Perfect na eksena; ganito na sana
Lagi ka sa isip ko; ikaw mismo
Ay nagbibigay ng saya pareho nito
Tumanda tayo; ako ay para sa’yo
Pag magbago ang buhay, uulitin ko
Tinuro mo sa akin the meaning of life
Our future is bright; its priceless, so let’s make it right
Basta’t ikaw ang kasama, ang feeling ko ay swerte
Dahil walang hamon na hindi natin mapwede
Ano man mangyare, ako nandito by your side
The lights in my eyes, and the love of my life

The world is twirling so does everyone . Situations evolve , people stuck in their nightmares , life began to crumble ; purpose of life has been dissipated into thin air . It hurts so much to actually witness the visible changes around me . My hands are trembling and I feel absolutely weak . The only one who has the power to turn everything back around is the one above . So never stop praying , your calls might not be answered as soon as you want or wish too BUT I always believe that the one above will always drop a few hints or two and when the right time comes , your prayers have been answered .

What’s Islam without patience . That is what each of our individual parents taught us . The one above is doing all this to test us , to see if we will be standing by him , asking and seeking for forgiveness when problems befall us . To make sure we think of him every single second of our life . That is why problems occur and that is when patience come into practice . Nobody said that LIFE was easy , roller coaster rides ; everyone has an equal share of it . Be it the poor , the rich , the young and the old .

Dearest readers , pillars and everyone . A particular day , my life has sank to the abyss . Only Allah and my pillars know how hard I cry . I have made a couple of mistake as a Muslim , but that does not stop me from praying . Life and the load that I had on my shoulder began to loosen its weight . Like I say , Patience will always comes into Practice in your everyday life . Let’s take the first step ; prayers . Second step ; Be around positive people whom love and care for you endlessly . Third step ; indulge on some huge calories of Ice Cream or Chocolates . The pain might not go forever , but at least that few seconds or hours of your life , you feel you are right on track . Feeling good is never a crime , let’s start appreciating life as how Allah wants us too . Heads up .

On another note , I am having bad menstrual cramps . I shall bite anyone I want too later on . Who shall be my victim *giggles*

yours truly ,

zimah

; short and simple

2009-12-06T19:42:00.003+08:00

Short and simple .
My eyes do not lie ;
and when I see something
I generate all of the meanings to it .
You are one lucky girl .
I have patience .

Side track .
I am not using this site no more .
Perhaps sometimes ,
but not always .
But do hop to my Tumblr

www.xoxo-livelaughlove.tumblr.com

I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND PERIOD

; complex and confuse

2009-12-05T10:21:00.002+08:00

I'm saying sorry in advance cos this won't always go to plan
Though we don't mean to take our love for granted
It's in our nature to forget what matters
How when the going is getting tough
And we're all about giving up
Things that we never thought we'd gonna say, gonna say them
Things that we never thought we'd play, gonna play them
It ain't perfect, but it's worth it
And it's always getting better
It's gonna take some time to get it right

The things that I crave and I yearn for has not been successfully scratch out from my list . My eyes are stunned with bewilderment as blood came trickling down my precious nose . My needed sleep was cut short and my body is really fatigue up to this hour . What is worst is that , I found a thing or two , but than again I should not let the words justify and speak for itself . Perhaps the particular sentences are not meant for the person , however , in cases like this ; you may never know .

It is hard to trust anyone right now . No seriously , I am confuse and complex and I loathe this feeling of mine . If only I was immune to it . In my mind , I know I have to do something , brain storm some ideas and digest it in my system , but I guess the things that I read and saw has already made up a strong foundation of wall which is tough for me to break it down . I am crumbling just a little bit . All I am saying is that , try putting yourself in my shoes . How does it feel . I shall keep this to myself .

Moving forward , I was busy with dance practices on Monday . Tuesday . Thursday and Friday . Our competition was postponed to a later date . So therefore , my Saturday is going to be fill with two slots of my performances at Heeran . On Wednesday , I was elated enough to meet my boy . Accompanied him to do his hair at Far East and I must say , he looks super good . We did a few rounds of window shopping and our eyes are set on some of the apparels there ; like the matching jackets and all that . Christmas baby , Christmas . We than had our dinner at Lucky Plaza and off we went burning our calories by walking from Town to City Hall . I could not stop hugging him at every junctions because seriously , this BOY means the world to me . We sat at the Memorial and it was awesome just sitting with him , doing the things we do and just gazing at the stars . My heart sank with happiness when he dedicated a Japanese song to me and he actually sang it . How can I not fall for you deeper everyday mister . I love you Boyfriend , and yes like what the song says ; you will always gonna be my love .

I guess this is it .
I need to wash up and pack my bags .
Dresses . Slippers . Extra clothes .
Wow .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Life and love

2009-11-29T18:30:00.006+08:00

And if you come up from under that water and there's fresh air,
just breathe baby,
God's got a blessin' to spare.
I know the process is so much stress but it's the progress that feels the best.
I came from the projects straight to success and you're next, just try,
they can't steal your pride, it's inside.
Then find it and keep on grindin'
'cause in every dark cloud theres a silver linin'; I know.

I would be lying to actually say that I was not looking forward to my Saturday . Just as I thought , my Saturday was splendidly spent with my Pillars , Emerged and my one and only . The rain poured ferociously and events was cancel and everyone decided to went straight to Dance Explosion . As soon as my legs step out of the taxi , my heart started beating because I saw my Baby sitting down getting all ready for the huge competition . 2 days of not meeting him and I truly do miss him a lot .

The girls and Mr.Faris dine at Pastamania and I shall never elaborate the consequences of eating at that place . My girls are suffering from the same issues with me . All in all , waiting for Dance Explosion to start and when it did , I have to say ; every crews in Singapore really step their game up and shine to a whole new level . I am proud enough that the dance scene is glowing .

Waiting for the results was a bore . SERIOUS BORE . However , in times like this , you can never ever expect something to come out . Mr.Faris propose to my dearest Miss Liya Baby in front of a couple of hundred of people and obviously , she was shy and when she accepted , everyone was in a bundle of joy .

Jump straight to the results , I was screaming with joy when Baby and Emerged clinch first in Dance Explosion . Trust me , I know how this event means to them and their hardwork and dedication was all paid off really well . The roofs were like tumbling down as people scream with absolute joy when the Champions was announced . Not being bias here , but yes , they deserve all this .

Celebrations . Celebrations . I shall not touch upon this . All I can say is , it is damn too awesome . Plus week days are here and I will be busy with dance practices since I have competition and a performance over at Heeran this coming 5th . Baby will be equally busy too since he is joining the same competition as me . A big no-no for me . Currently , we are competing in 2 competitions , the thrill is there actually .

To sum it all up .
NOT READY FOR SCHOOL .
I am super tired
My back bone hurts because Miss Liya Baby's sister just jumped on my backbone =(
more pictures up on Facebook

yours truly ,
zimah

; Hari Raya

2009-11-28T00:39:00.003+08:00

So where do we go from here,
With all this fear in our eyes?
And, where can love take us now?
We’ve been so far down.
We can still touch the sky.

The tables are turned ; and now I have a taste on what is like to lost my touch to the closest technology that I have ever been presented . Yes indeed , my laptop is currently down and I am stuck using the computer at my parents room . Such a haste , the key board are not to my liking but what can a girl like me do ; this is my only last resort .

A couple of hours ago , I have safely reached the shores of sunny Singapore and up till now I am experiencing a slight sea sick due to the ferocious waves that occurred during my journey . My heart began to sank so deep till an extent that I was awaken from my sleep . I was holding my Mother's precious fingers for guidance and safety .

Currently , I am missing on the main important people in my life . My dearest Pillars and my amazing Boyfriend whom I tried endlessly to get through when I was at the neighbouring country . They so need to owe me a huge and warm hug tomorrow and that is a must . I am well excited to meet them the following day to head down to Dance Explosion over at Tampines .

Well , when I was on my trip to the neigbouring country . I learnt a couple of things and I shall value it well . I am a fortunate young lady who gets what I want most of the time . Well , all I am saying is , my parents and I plus a couple of their friends have invited 50 kids who have no parents at all to have dinner with us and the look on their face was priceless . I had to hide back my tears ; seriously . You should check my Face-book out to see some of the pictures .

To sum it all up .
Alhamdullilah
Syukor .
It's good to be back

yours truly ,
zimah

; My knight

2009-11-22T18:26:00.002+08:00

There's nothing left to say
Don't waste another day
Just you and me tonight
Everything will be okay
If it's alright with you then it's alright with me
Baby let's take this time let's make new memories

I have been caught up with my days till an extent that I have actually slip pass my mind to blog this already dusty space of mine . A couple of negative and positive events actually bump in my way and there were moments that I cannot lie that I was super weak and frustrated enough with myself . I could not move a mile , I did not had the strength to walk , eat or even communicate . However , I have learnt my mistake and I am bless enough that the situation has already been place to the trash side .

My Saturday was a bliss . I met up with the girls whom I miss out on and I miss a lot . My time was limited as I had a birthday party to attend to at Jurong . I manage to catch the first batch of selected groups who undergo their auditions at the stage of Hougang . Initially , I had no clue where in the world was Hougang and I am lucky enough to have a fully Singaporean pillar of mine to navigate my way . *giggles*

Dance Explosion was a so-so event for me . The host keep going on and on about the booths that was set up , and the point was , no one was actually paying attention to those . I was down with my coughs still and I look as lethargic on that particular time as the day before was a torture to me and only me , myself and I know of . I bump into Ralph and he asked me to turn , and I was beaming with joy when I saw Baby . Gave him a quick hug and kissed him . My heart beam with joy more when I realize that Baby was using my shoe to compete on stage . How sweet .

Once the event was over , Baby and I went Jurong to attend to Aleisha's birthday and once we are done with that , we met up with Emerged once again . Kak Rina and Shikin was drilling Baby with tons of hilarious questions that accumulates to all the laughter and giggling that I was having yesterday .

To sum it all up ,
My oh my
I love my Pillars , My family and My boyfriend .
I can't wait to head down to KL to buy matching kicks for us .
cuz' we already plan to use the same shoe for Dance Infinity =)

lastly ,
two can play the game . I shall close and eye but I shall never forget . We shall see how far you go

MY GIRLS .
I MISS .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Tingles down my spine

2009-11-18T20:46:00.002+08:00

I'm calling his phone up just to tell him how much
I really love him 'cause he's everything I want
He listens to me, cares for me so I truly believe

God sent me an angel from above
That's gonna love me for life
Might as well be perfect only because
It's the only way I can describe, so

If this isn't love, tell me what it is
'Cause I could be dreaming or just plain crazy
If this isn't love, tell me what it is
'Cause I never felt like this baby
If this isn't love

Every memories I had with you are currently being put on replay at the back of my head . I smile to myself and when I am doing so , I send my prayers to the one above for blessing me with such a delicate soul in my life . The road we are in may have flaws and all , but I truly believe that the love we have bonded is much stronger than any of the obstacles presented to us . I put every amount of trust , faith , patience and understanding in this relationship and in God's willing our future plans will be achieve .

I remember the very first time that I met you . Me and my girls have already had our scrumptious breaking of fast meal and there you were text messaging me to walk to the alleys of Haji Lane . I knew I was not into smoking nor sheesha , but something in me nudge me to go and meet you for the very first time . Do not get me wrong , I have always been the type who never meets anyone she just knew but there was something about that night ; that night told me that there is a start of something new and something special .

My heart beats fast , I was getting breathless . I was nervous . At the corner of my eye , I saw a person , and it felt that my heart was melting and I was elated to find out it was you . Enough about the first meeting . All in all , my heart tingles still whenever I am meeting you . It feels like a new day , a new memory , a new moment for us to spend . I simply love days when I am well safe in your arms . I simply love days when you cook for me . I simply love days when we head to your practices . I simply love you .

Today shall be mark as the fourth day of not seeing your baby face . I am well disappointed with myself for falling this terribly sick . However , something about today make me smile like I use too . Since my girls are not free to attend to this meeting and Mama would not allow me to make my way there , JR has been a nice brother to me and have volunteered in representing my crew in the meeting . I did not realize that Mama text message Baby . Here is how the conversation go

Mama : Hi Ram . This is Aunty Su . Message to say thanks to your crewmate and you for filling in for zimah tonight .
Baby : No worries I got Zimah's back =) . and I know she not feeling well so just tell her to take care of herself
Mama : Thanks dear
Baby : No problem Auntie

Here comes the funny part . As soon as Mama received the text from Baby , she called me and was giggling at Baby's response . Mama so the miang . I like =)

To sum it all up ,
I sincerely miss my dearest cinta
I so need to see him badly right now .
I so need to hug him badly right now .
I am sure that he is happy spending time with his secondary friends .
I sincerely love my baby so much .

yours truly ,
zimah

; US

2009-11-18T19:29:00.000+08:00

Find more videos like this on DANCE CHANNEL

The interview

Find more videos like this on DANCE CHANNEL

The competition

; Confusion

2009-11-17T20:03:00.002+08:00

It’s like you caught up in a maze
You keep on going in circles boy you’re trying to find your way out
But its time I put on my cape and
Put that S on my chest
Boy I wanna come and save you

The cards are all turn and I have to summon my courage and full strength to play with the game presented to me now . I am being led to a dark path which is fill with mainly confusion , and I am struggling to drag myself out . I shall keep this in my thoughts and it has been proven but like I say , I got to brace myself and play this game all out .

Side track , Mama and Abah came to my school and had to fetch their little princess due to the fact that my fever was increasing and I was getting constant headaches . We rode the bus to Haji Lane to have our lunch at Hajjah Maimunah and my appetite was not there and I did not consume like I use too . Gradually , I began quiet and Abah flag a cab for us to head home .

Currently , my temperature is 38.5 degrees and is not cool . I have to head down to Redhill for a meeting with the organiser for Dance Infinity . Bok Ralph please take care of me when I am there , since Baby is having his Graduaction Night .

Speaking of Baby , I miss him too much . Pray hard that I can meet him the next day . My love for him is increasing when we are distant . I truly am in love with him .

To sum it all up ,
I am not going to be in school
AGAIN =)

yours truly ,
zimah

; Always love

2009-11-16T22:24:00.003+08:00

My mind have always fly off to its own element whenever my ears indulge to this particular song . My heart rate began to slow down as I soak in the lyrics and replay it at the back of my mind . So which song am I talking about ?

...
..
.

Suffocate by J.holidays .
and here is the lyrics

Now even though I try to play it off
I'm thinking about you all day long
And I can't wait for shorty to come through
From your lips and back up to your eyes
My hands on your hips when we grind
I'm fantasizing bout what I'm gonna do to you
Got me fiening for her love can't lie
Man you should see how she got me
Spending all this time with her
And I could leave her if I wanted to
Her love turns men into fools
Tell me what a man is to do

Cuz I can't breathe when you talk to me
I can't breathe when you're touching me
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind
I can't breathe when you talk to me
I can't breathe when you're touching me
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind

Whenever we up in this bed
And my fingers fall in your hair
I wonder if you feel me watching you
Cuz I can't go a night without your lovin
Got me looking at this phone
Every time it rings I hope it's you girl
You got my bracing for your love
And I fallen for you I can't lie
I just wanna be with you
Yes she got me there I said
And somebody call the paramedics
Tell em to hurry up and come through

Cuz I can't breathe when you talk to me (baby)
I can't breathe when you're touching me (when you touch me)
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind (I'm going outta my mind)
I can't breathe when you talk to me
I can't breathe when you're touching me
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind

Don't ever leave me girl
I need you inside my world
I can't go a day without you
And see nobody else will ever do
I'll never feel like I feel with you

Cuz I can't breathe when you talk to me
I can't breathe when you're touching me (when you touch me)
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind (I'm going outta my mind)
I can't breathe when you talk to me (oh when you talk to me)
I can't breathe when you're touchin me (I can't breathe when you touchin me)
I suffocate when you're away from me
So much love you take from me
I'm going outta my mind (I'm going outta my mind)

Oh no no I can't breathe
Oh no no I can't breathe (I can't breathe)
Oh no no I can't breathe oh no

Yours truly ,
zimah

; Crawl back into love

2009-11-16T20:15:00.003+08:00

Baby right there
he's got everything I need 
and I'm gon' tell him one time 
Give you everything you need
Down to my last dime
he makes me happy
I know where I'll be
Right by your side cause
he is the one

I was too engross with my fear of the dark till an extent that I was stubborn enough to not heed Baby's request in taking up my medications , and surprise surprise ; Just as I thought , my flu became rather worst today and I am having quite a difficult load to breathe . Not only that , as I am typing this , I am actually shivering because my fever is taking up 70 percent of my body system . To add on , I am experiencing a painful scar of headaches that makes it harder for me to walk without feeling the pain . A couple of times , I feel like throwing everything up . So not a cool feeling .

Any-hooters minus the negatives that I indulge today , I would love to express my thoughts on my packed schedules in weeks to come . I foresee a very busy and hectic life ahead . Practices , dumb-ass school days , family time ; I have to learn on how to juggle them all . I am so cool with practices and what-ever-not , but school days are a no-no . I too can foresee that my body system will be hit with quite an amount of lethargy . I got to get ready for that .

On another note . I am quite elated that my team advance through the finals for Dance Infinity . When I think about it ; I conclude that it will be such a blissful event because I am competing with Baby and all my brothers and sisters . At the same time , I am nervous due to the fact that Emerged is one of the strongest competitor there is in that competition . Whatever it is , me and my girls will do our very best . Side tracking , since I am packed with these competitions and of course various performances , and Baby too is busy with his competitions and such ; I am afraid that time will never be on our side . However , I will do my very best to squeeze some quality time with my Baby love . Our two months is nearing and I am excited ; very . Wednesday will be my time with Baby . Let's cherish every of the time we will spend even if I am surrounded with your secondary school friends .

To sum it all up .
To my dearest crew ;
Tuesday , Thursday and Fridays .
Practice at the usual place .
Fridays equals to studio .
Bee will sit out this week due to her commitments to Dylies .
In advance ;
good luck Bee , kill the stage .

I am sick
not cool
not and never cool .

yours truly ,
zimah

; My girls are my roots

2009-11-15T14:50:00.007+08:00

Everyday is my day
Ima do it my way
Everyday

Everything about me
What they love about me?!
Everything

Everywhere that i be
Feel V.I.P
Baby
Yea, Baby
And Everybodys cool but
Ya’ll just aint me

As lethargy begins to seep in my system , my whole mind are on hibernate mode and is half responsive to the things around me . I have develop bad major back ache cramps and seriously , that is my weakest spot . I barely can sit nor stand up straight like I use too . However , all this pain are all temporary , what matters the most is that the memory of yesterday will prolong as it will .

By far , hands down and I shall not be bias here ; my Saturday was awesome and is the best Saturday I can ever spent . First and foremost , I met up with my secondary school girlfriends whom I use to play soccer with and for real I do miss playing some serious tough knack street soccer matches . Since time was not and never on my side these few days , I had to rush down to Pasir Ris and head to Baby's crib to pass him my Nike shoe and as for me , I will be taking his Nike Air Jordan as I will be using it for my competition later that day . I found out a few little stuff and I shall put it on my last post . Flagged a cab to Bukit Batok and it cost me all of the allowances I had ; great .

The girls was already getting ready , looking all pretty and all doll-ed up . Once everyone was done , we head down to Redhill for rehearsals . Once we are done with rehearsals , it seem like forever waiting for that event to even start . Once it was our turn , we held one another close . Gave our prayers to the one above to give us the strength and confidence to go through everything that has been laid for us . My heart began to pump when the host spoke of our name and I knew it was time to bring everything we have put all of our heart and soul on the floor . My heart beam with joy when I saw Baby and Emerged right in front of my very eyes .

The comments from the judges has left me and my girls speechless . It was an honour to take all of those comments . Praises to Allah for that . Results was something neither of us would want to hear HOWEVER we were so bless that we were the first team out of the four to make it through the finals . Praises to Allah once again . And right now , my December is seriously pack with 4 performances and 1 competition . I really cannot wait till holidays sink in my way .

Spending the night away with my love one . I am bless ; truly . Mama was being so nice . Baby I cinta you like how I cinta your mama . Bus rides was awesome . One hour . Take that . I felt so safe under your care Baby . I love how you hold me tight and constantly ask me if my pain was subsiding . I love how you hold my hands as tight as possible . I love how sweet you can get when you offer up a super awesome massage to my aching back . I love how cute you can get when you sleep on the table . I love how adorable you really look when you were engross in playing those online game . And so much more . Most importantly , I love you baby .

All other pictures are up on Facebook , so do hop by

To end off ;
You may think that I am living under the dark shell . However in my eyes and the eyes of my girls , as I stand corrected you are what they say . Do not ever cross my line , because if you do , I shall get even . Revenge may never be in my dictionary but you are messing with my happiness and I shall burn you if you take that away . So whatever it is , stop what you are doing because the lost being will never hop back . Enough said =)

To sum it all up
school days .
I got to persevere .
3 more weeks to go and than
HOLIDAYS BABY .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Sleepy

2009-11-15T04:39:00.004+08:00

I shall update about Dance Infinity once I am back safe at home .

but all in all

I love my Baby .

period .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Beyond my weakness

2009-11-11T12:06:00.003+08:00

It's amazing how you knock me off my feet
Everytime you come around me I get weak
Nobody ever made me feel this way
You kiss my lips and then you take my breath away
So I wanna know

I wanna know what turns you on
So I can be all that and more
I'd like to know what makes you cry
So I can be the one who always makes you smile

The morning began to greet me with an unexpected surprise visit from Mr.Headache and Miss.Cramps . I had difficulties in getting myself up to walk and I felt a few droplets of warm tears falling down on my dried cheeks . I know myself really well , and I know that I will always have this pain whenever my menses hit the first official day . However , heartless as some may be , I will have to pull through and just brace the storm and head to school with the never ending pain .

On a lighter note , at 2 in the morning ; that sweetest boyfriend text me this . "Sayang I miss =( , I love you Baby" . So tell me how can I not blush and smile weakly upon reading that . Since Boyfriend was out by the City with Zad , I accompanied him the morning away till 3 plus in the morning . Boyfriend wanted me to go back to sleep since I have school the next day , so after much procrastinating , that Boyfriend ring me up and my heart flutters with joy and excitement when I hear his voice , and so I agreed in placing my heavy head to bed .

To sum it up .
My body is insanely tired .
Cramps here and there .
You shall see how I walk .
and to whom it may concern
This Is It ;
your last .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Silence

2009-11-10T23:44:00.002+08:00

I love you,
Yes i do.
Ill be with you aslong as you want me to,
Until the end of time.
From the day i met you i knew we'd be together.
And now i know i want to be with you forever, i want to marry you and i want to have
your kids.
Thinking can never compare to the feeling of your kisses.

My muscles are aching and I can barely walk a meter without finding myself limping and biting my lips to endure the pain that is present . However , let me take this and twist the whole motion in a positive manner . Like they usually say ; no pain no gain .

Any-two-way , I just came back from practice a couple of hours back . I am overcome with sheer lethargy but I need to force myself to sleep at 12 in the morning and slap myself up at 6 . Such a tedious schedule but I am sure I shall go through all this obstacles head on . On a lighter note , Baby sent me off to Republic Poly and chill out with Zad before making his way back to bustling City Hall to meet up with this well known Philippine crew .

To sum it all up .
Hectic Hectic Hectic .
I need all of the strength to go through this week .
aku cinta baby .
period .

yours truly ,
zimah

; too much

2009-11-09T11:17:00.005+08:00

I'm too young for tears in the night
And it's to soon for this to be right
Don't wanna mess with your pride
The questions not when but why

In a world whereby everything that surrounds me are in shades of grey . One can sit down and reflect on why certain situations had to happen . I guess I am mainly the problematic one , for always thinking the negatives and come up with a rash decision . It is never fun to always break down countless of times just thinking of what you want in life .

On a lighter note . Video shoot was seriously funny and in the same time awesome . Even if the whole squad was not present , it was all cool . Free-style session was an eye opener for myself as I can really see that my girls can really ace on that element really well , especially Dinah . We had to shoot a couple of times on the routines that we have chosen , but the most exciting part was the interview . We girls were like giggling and laughing most of the time , and even I choke on some words due to my nervous-ness . The questions asked was so long to and extent that while I was talking I had to look at the camera and say "what was the question again" OR "can you repeat the question please" , and everyone in the room burst out in fits of laughter . Alhamdullilah for the opportunity and platform . We would not be here if it was not for Emerged . Thank you so much guys .

By than it was pouring , head down to watch Hip Hop Pulse Competition and the competition was such a I-don't-really-know-how-to-put-it-into-words . But all in all , congratulations to Freekzy , Emerged and Funky Nutz . Baby was awesome like he usually does . Thank you Kaye for keeping an eye on him when I was away *giggles* . You know I know . Had my lunch and dinner over at Lucky Plaza . After which , met up with Emerged to lend their speaker . Went home and my body is in pain .

Something weird happen today . My mom was shock to see that I was sleeping under my bed . How did I get there ? Me , myself do not really have a clue neither . I think I was too sad till I sleep walk or something ? That is really really weird I tell you , AND because of that , my head and my back bone hurt like pricking needles =(

Baby and I had breakfast cum lunch together . Alhamdullilah we are sailing through . He laughed over my pathetic negativity . I love him with all of my heart .
Baby , I guess lethargy plays an important role to both of our emotions . Plus I know that you are happily sleeping now . =D

To sum it all up .
I hope everything is going to be fine .
Insyallah .

yours truly ,
zimah

; The Issues and The Ideas

2009-11-07T09:43:00.002+08:00

When I come to the clubs, step aside
Pop the seats, don't be hating me in the line
V.I.P 'cause you know I gotta shine
I'm Fergie Ferg
And me love you long time

All my girls get down on the floor
Back to back drop it down real low
I'm such a lady but I'm dancing like a ho
'cause you know I don't give a fuck so here we go!

Gradually , in my eyes ; the circle is getting smaller as the issues around us escalates and mount to a steep mountain . Precisely , none of us even wish it could happen but in a way , we already had build a strong foundation of wall that might oppose any force that might come our way . In contrary with the above sentences , an issue has been bugging and infesting us . Pondering on why and how the matter could actually break lose , resulting in total chaos .

If you know me , I am the type that can never get mad over something for so long . My flaws is that I forgive and forget . Judging on that current issue , yes I still am grumpy over certain situations but totally , I forgive that main person who is under the limelight . So what now ? After I caught a few fights on the cyber world , I get seriously restless and I pray that everything will be settle , be it between the main person and her OR between the main person and us the crew . Which ever way , as long as it is all done and settle with . Come on , it is the 21st century , let us all be matured can we ; because life is too short to fight and fuss over stuff that is so unimportant .

Jumping on a different side , my schedule is seriously pack in the weeks to come . My Saturday is going to be fill up with dance practice over at Republic . My Sunday will be fill up with photo-shoots and video-shoots at Redhill . My next Monday.Thursday.Friday is being occupied with dance practices again . My Tuesday.Wednesday is filled with teaching some primary six students a routine for their Graduation Day . And as for my next Saturday , it will be all out for the competition . I need all of the strength that I can get . All in all there is 3 new routines . Jocking Jay Z , Rockstar and Imma Be . Awesome . I just need my laptop back to do my mix .

To sum it all up ,
tiring days .
tiring times .
School has been keeping on my toes .
2 test next week .
such bummer .

& I miss my boyfriend who is also busy with dance practices =(

yours truly,
zimah

; The Best I ever had

2009-11-03T21:48:00.002+08:00

I was waiting for you to tell me you were ready
I know what to do, if only you would let me
As long as you're cool with it, I'll treat you right
Here is where you wanna be

Honestly , I do not wish to elaborate on a string of situation that has hit me lately , I am sure my Pillars are well known to it and is so not foreign about the circle that I am in ; but judging on how smooth my life is heading (Alhamdullilah to that) , I shall corner every of my positive thoughts and place them down .

I had a random visit to White Sands and I bump into Ralph and Zad at their workplace . Coincidentally , Ralph would want to discuss some matters with me . Do not take it the wrong way , it is all good . After hearing about some stuff , I was all hype up and would want to gear up my Pillars for our competition on the 14Th of November . Plus , Emerged and my crew will be performing on the same day for a Dance Showcase at Heeran on the 2oth of December . Tell me how can I not get super excited ; Baby is going to be there dancing with me , I will be dancing with my Pillars , so tell me where can this go wrong . Insyaallah , the event will be good .

After such a worn out day in school , I was all mood out . I tried my luck about asking Baby to send me home and he agreed . Richmond (Baby's younger brother) talked to me for the very first time and I was beyond stoked and he even offered me some fries *giggles* My spirits were lifted up . Upon reaching home , Mama was there and Mama was surprisingly very ticklish today . Me and Baby had our dinner alone , well with the presence of little one Raiyan of course , and soon one by one , my family member started to pour in . I can really tell Baby was shy and nervous , but at the end of the day , he said that my family was "tight" *giggles*

Baby and I walked to my Grandparents home to get my spectacles and off I send him to the bus stop . I truly believe , that this day is equals to more future visits are to come for us . Insyaallah

To sum it all up
Alhamdullilah days have been good
school suck that I can't lie .
People change .
I miss my pillars
and my boyfriend .
period

yours truly ,
zimah

; It screams Emerged

2009-11-01T14:57:00.005+08:00

I’m calling his phone up
Just to tell him how much
I really love him ‘cause
His everything I want
He listens to me, he cares for me
So I truly believe

God sent me an angel
Up from above
That’s gonna love me for life
Might as well be perfect only because
It’s the only way I can describe

Evidently , Dance Infinity was that one event that I would never would want to miss out on . Although the event started off a wee bit slow due to the bad weather ; that night ended up smooth . Not being bias here , but Emerged and Groove Unlimited both representing the Filipino Dance Club was off the chain . They step their game up and they were the best of the night ; hands down .

I am seriously proud of Baby for executing all of those moves . Alhamdullilah . However he just got to learn on how to keep his hat on his head *giggles* . Like I mention earlier , the night was smooth . It seriously felt that the dance floor was ours . After which , I had to cab back home and I am sure Baby and the rest had an awesome party over at Ralph's crib , and currently Baby is sleeping soundly at home .

I truly believe , being with Emerged made me learn a few things or two which I can bring forward and implant on my crew . I am very very bless because knowledge is priceless . Speaking of my crew , I miss my Pillars so much . Being down with sickness is so not cool because I miss out on a lot of my practices . I so need to get my sweatpants and my baggy shirts on next week . All out Baby , All out .

On the other hand , Kaye has been a great girlfriend and a companion to me . Before the event started , I made my way over to her place and I was amaze . Luxurious house . We shared some girls talk and did what normal girls do . It was all worthwhile , all the talks we had , I will keep that in mind .

To sum it all up .
I know my week , and I know how it went .
All in all ; look on the bright side .
I love my Baby so much .
Heading to Lakeside for Kenduri .
I got to learn how to refrain myself from crying .

To end this off ,
here are some of the selected pictures .
Others are up on Facebook

yours truly ,
zimah

; You know I'll be over there

2009-10-31T12:15:00.002+08:00

In My arms In my mind all the time I wanna keep you right by my side till I die im gonna hold you down and make sure everything is right wit you
You can never go wrong if you
LET ME HOLD YOU
Down like a real friends supposed to im trying to show you the life of somebody like you should be living
OOOooHHhh Baby Baby
You could never go wrong If you let me hold you

I know what my eyes speak and I know that it does not lie most of the time . I guess it is real weird that words of wisdom is all I see and hear lately and in my eyes , I see some love reuniting . Blinded by reality and judging on the heavier side was all my heart could take in the past . Right now , the way I feel it , everything seem crystal clear and all balance up ; but I have to admit it , one side is stronger than the other . I am pretty sure that I will be receiving some "i-don't-really-understand-what-this-section-is-about-kind-off-look" , but all I know is that , I will try my very best to survive and pull everything together . This I promise ; to me , myself and I .

On another note , alhamdullilah that I am smiling and laughing like I use too . Despite the fact that I still do ponder about my late grandfather . On a random walk to the prestige Esplanade toilet , I did some reflection and was in deep thoughts . I was soak in all of my thinking's and I felt a rush ; it was a good vibe though . I smile weakly because for I know that my late grandfather is safe in God's hand , and I am sure he is on his way to the gates of heaven anytime soon . Insyaallah .

I better get going . I am suppose to reach Kaye's crib at 2pm but I am still taking my time in doing so . Heading to support Baby and Emerged in Dance Infinity today .

Yours truly ,
zimah

; Be strong

2009-10-28T22:42:00.000+08:00

I am beyond devastated . I just lost my Grandfather and I wish it was a dream . I cannot stop pondering his face when he was alive , and in short ; I cannot stop thinking of him . This takes a whole lot of recovery on my part . So therefore , I shall leave this blog untouched for a couple of days .
What better way to saviour this moment than to be seriously ill , yet a heartless human being has been complaining about my attendance causing the elders to actually force me to show up in school . How I wish I was right in his face , coughing and better still faint in front of his very eyes .

I am not well
and I am not OK

yours truly ,
zimah

; Fact or Fiction , you decide

2009-10-26T21:11:00.002+08:00

I am in love with you
You set me free
I can't do this thing
Called life without you here with me
Cause I'm Dangerously In Love with you
I'll never leave
Just keep lovin' me
The way I love you loving me

If only I could write a book filled with different phases of my life , than I guess my book will be as thick as it could ever be . But right now , I guess I shall cover a sneak peek of the highest point of my life so far , and if it does bores you with this lengthy post of words of mine ; I apologize because I am typing on my perspective and point of view . So here it goes .

...
..
.

Walking down on an empty aisle , with only the tunes of my songs blasting through my ears , I feel a rush of heart felt sudden warmth in my system . As I chase after the street lights to guide me home , my eyes glance over couples who were so devoted to one another . Hugging and laughing like there is no tomorrow . Never once have jealousy came through my brain , I was happy enough that the world still spreads enough love for everyone . I beam out a pleasant smile and never stop praying to the sparkly night sky to bless me with someone who I can share my joy , my pain , my love , my everything too .

But that was two years ago . Currently , my prayers has been answered by the mighty one . When I look back at it , it was funny enough that we have bump into one another a couple of times during lots of events but still did not even share eye contacts with one another . However I am truly bless to have meet his path and share my whole devotion to . Whenever I think about him , my heart sinks and flutter with pure joy and excitement ; I guess this is a feeling of LOVE .
My eyes could see a couple of flaws in him , and I was ready to accept all that because of the strength I have towards him . If he could accept mine , so can I . Breathing words and expressing myself was a routine for me and it came to a point that I realize that I am really truly in love with this guy . A couple of secrets are made , and it feels like my world is complete . Though the fights are unavoidable , but it is all good . I realize that I believe in arguments because it will make us know deeper about our flaws and all . Together has been in my brain storage system ever since you claim that it was our theme song . All in all , this chapter of mine , I shall keep close to me and every promises that I made , I will hold it tight and never let it slip me by .

However , I do have my different kind of love . The love My Pillars shower me is something that not even you , or you can ever break it apart or try to replace it . Many come and go , leaving me under the cold moonlight , but them ; nothing like that could ever come close . I am truly well take them as a blessing in my life . The shelter me protection and guide me to the light . Giving me countless of advice and always remind me to be myself and be strong . Fight every emotions and demons that have been infesting on my mind and when I am having a war with that , they never let their armour down and stood by me , and when I come out as victorious , it is because of them who made it all happen . The love I have is nothing I can ever explain because each of them are my strengths and they are part of me .

Do not ever let me start narrating about my family . But the truth is , even if they give me a whole load of stress , I still love them endlessly for they are the ones who build me up to where I am right now . I believe that I would not be here , showing my passion and talent if it was not for the support that my family has given me . I believe that I would never be the patient girl that I am , if it was not for my Mother who always remind me that everything happens for a reason and bad things will befall on those who sprout words that are untrue and that hurt us in one way or another . I guess I owe all my 18 years of existance to them , for they have been bringing me up in a perfect manner .

I guess , back than , I was complaining a lot , and right now , I think that I am older and mature enough to actually realize that LOVE has been around me for this past 18 years . It is just that , I never took the initiative to realize that I was filled and surrounded by the pleasant feeling . And for that , I will love to thank everyone of the people who made an impact to my life .

To sum it all up ,
I am sick .
Really sick .
Abah is taking me to my private doctor tomorrow .
And my Wak passed away and I will be visiting her the next day .
I had a pleasant talk with Mama today .
She was all smiling when she was asking about Baby .
I clear some doubts with her , and she was really funny talking to me .
I love you Mama but the days have been cruel towards us ,
but we will pull through
like we always do

To end off ,
the world is filled with love .
Search it
Trust me ,
it is worth the search .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Short post

2009-10-26T15:03:00.002+08:00

Deep inside , I can feel the ache and the pain still lingers . How am I suppose to heal in an instant . I truly believe that ; that figure is breathing on my neck to say the least twenty-four-seven . I see a huge need to break down right now and let everything out but I am too stoked , because I got the girls with me . I got to stand strong and overcome this huge obstacle .

But right now ,

My heart , my mind and my soul is mentally bruised .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Tracing my steps

2009-10-22T17:12:00.003+08:00

You understand me
At least you say you do
Lately thats enough for me
Looking for perfect
Surrounded by artificial
You're the closest thing to real i've seen

Praises to Allah . Mama understands my reasons of not attending school today . My body was ferociously alarmed by the constant head spinning that occurred since yesterday and the multiple counts of aches that are consistently haunting me with pain . Mama is quarantine-ing me as for today and I must be obedient enough to rest and recharge myself fully because I need all of the energy I need for my week-ends .

On another note , my eyes do not lie and when it sees something , it speaks the truth . Lately I feel that the shores are pushing me away ; further than reality . My heart beats slowly but I guess there is no other way to grasp the whole situation . Evidently , I truly believe partially it has been my fault the whole entire time . Yes , I am being selfish by blaming myself . I express my inner thoughts with Baby and he has been giving me a shoulder to lean on and that I have to thank him .

Changes ; good or bad we will all go through this phase . Learning how to adapt to it will make us stronger and better . All I can do right now is to breathe in the positives and breathe out the demons that have been infesting my mind . Prayers to the morning and night sky ; do keep my love ones safe and secure and I hope you bless them with a good week ahead . In God's Willing .

To sum it up ,
Praises to Allah for making the school of Applied Health Sciences clinch the 2nd spot .
My Pillars where ever you are at , I hope you are enjoying your day
My most missed best classmates , I will be back tomorrow .
Sorry .
and to Baby , please take care of yourself when you are playing basketball .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Insomaniac

2009-10-22T02:28:00.002+08:00

I don’t pretend to know what love is for everyone , but I can tell you what it is for me . Love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person. Love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself , Including the things you might be ashamed of . Love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone , but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you .

I believe in love , and in arguing . In smiling until your cheeks hurt and laughing until you cry . I believe in being told you’re beautiful , dancing in the rain and miracles . I believe in second chances, even when you’ve completely screwed up .

yours truly ,
zimah

; A dickhead day

2009-10-21T23:56:00.005+08:00

I think you're truely something special
Just what my dreams are really made of
Lets stay together you and me boy
There's no one like you around ohh baby

There are a million reasons why my system is not a hundred percent responsive right now . I have to admit , I am lazing around while diligently typing away all of this words that pops up in my brain . Honestly , I am seriously lethargic and my legs are sore . That is what you get for wearing a shoe one size smaller , and I seriously do feel that my blisters are explosively painful and I can narrow down all the possible outcomes that my feet's are going to get ; blood clot and so on .

Praises to Allah for making this day come . I had my Performing Arts Challenge in school and I was nervous wreck . I could not stop moving around and my appetite was decreasing . Wastage of my money indeed . Praises to Allah once again , I do feel that my school represented in one way or another and I do pray that we shall win the Over-all best school award . In God's willing .

A big thank you to friends , pillars , classmates for the support that was given . I am truly bless to have you significant people in my life . A big thank you to those girls who randomly gave me positive comments . A big thank you to the girl who hug me . Although I feel that it was not a perfect routine , I thank you once again for all the support given .

On the other side , I am particular mood out to two things . One ; Champions League are not being catered by Starhub and I am seriously F-ed up due to that . I need my morning late games by Manchester United so badly , and Two ; what a dick-head day today . I will bite that wandering ghost hands for stealing some of my Pillars properties . Curses .

To end this off , Baby thank you for cheering me up . I am in love with you deeply day by day . AND thanks Zad for disturbing me over my lost item . *gives a pathetic facial expression and laugh*

To sum it all up .
Good Bye Wednesday .
No more being afraid of you .
AND HELLO Thursday .
Please be nice and let me rest .

yours truly ,
zimah

; One Month

2009-10-20T00:17:00.002+08:00

twenty-zero.nine-zero.nine ;

Babyboy , though we have to agree that small arguments knock on our doors , we were courageous enough to pull everything together , in which I realize that due to all this , we became much more closer day by day .

Having you around is like a dream come true . You shower me with everything be it little or big , I take every moment into thought and will always cherish it . I feel safe and secure when I am with you and no doubt that my heart flutters with excitement and joy when you hold me tight . You and I both know what we do and what we say , and this I promise you ; my words will be true , and I shall keep it .

Babyboy , I am looking forward till that very day when you and I combine both of our choreography's and we shall feeling-feeling So You Think You Can Dance . *giggles* Our passion and heart beat goes out to dancing , and I guess that is our common ground . Heading to your practices , I learnt a lot from you and your crew . My heart smiles when I see you laying all of your passion on the floor . Baby , I am proud of you and I wish you all the best for your competition on the 31st .

I too am looking forward to spending more and more time with you . Like the hours we spent on Fridays . You know and I know . You said that you want Love and Trust from me ; and so I shall give it to you a hundred percent or even more .

Babyboy , I shall end off by saying Thank You for opening up my heart and letting me into yours . Thank You for showing me the love that I have been missing for years . Thank you for always being there for me and hearing my thoughts and Thank You for loving me .

I love you

Yours Sincerely ,
Baby Z

and since I am here .
Happy Birthday to Liy Allen

; My life

2009-10-18T19:03:00.012+08:00

Now who's right there
Every time you cry
Go to sleep
And wake up on your side
Endless love
I always provide
They hatin' on us
And you should know why

Precious sleeps , best companion , endless love , fun and laughter ; the best way to summarize my perfect weekends . I truly believe that some juicy details are meant to be kept between a few circle . Friday was by far the specific day that I wish that could never really have an end into it . Everything and anything is safely lock in my heart .

To add on to my section on Fridays' , Emerged was all sweat out with their intensive practices . Their routine was clean , transitioning and positioning are all well done . My prayers goes out to them and I do really wish that they can clinch the top spot . Sitting down watching them laying every our their passion on the floor made my legs twitch and I had every urge to just get up and dance , and SO I did , with Karel of course . Oh wait , here is the best part . KAREL makes delicious Brownies *huge smiles* .

My Saturday was another day that I wish everything could actually put on pause so that I can saviour every sweet moments with My Pillars . I shall not discuss what I felt earlier but I get to my senses and I pulled myself back down . We had a performance at Bukit Panjang C.C and thank you Mama for buying a whole table for us to sit and eat once we are done performing . Our table was lucky enough to win a prize . The night was pure fun , we stood up for Maya , we raised our hands in the air because we feel the music , I shouted for Fauzie Laily , plus Sasha and Bee went bonkers over Hyrul , it went Perfect .

So , the girls slept over at my place . Awesome Awesome Awesome . Liyana wanted to have a late lunch at MacDonald's but she ended up sleeping like a log . I guess I was the second person to sleep , and I was surprise to actually find myself on Mama's bed . How did I get there . *wonders* . All in all , like I mention earlier , my weekends are perfectly spent with the people whom I love the most . I so cannot wait for Liyana's chalet next week . Friday , Saturday and Sunday people . Hail Yeah

To end off , Baby you and I both know . Under the block having Kuey Teow . I remember it was your first . Giggling back at your face when you had "taugeh" in your mouth and I had to pull it out . How you sleep and you actually talk when you were sleeping , and you claim that I did that too . Endless conversation that makes me feel safe . The way you tell me that you are wearing the jersey that I wore the day before when you are heading to bed . The way you smile and laugh and showed the letter "L" with your fingers when I said something nonsensical and totally random . I love you Babyboy . I am proud to say that ; you are the best that I have ever had . I do hope that your practice today runs smoothly , DO not , I repeat DO NOT over work yourself . *smiles* . I miss you , and I love you .

To sum it all up .
I have a big bruise on my left knee .
School days are back .
and Wednesday is approaching .
Scared

yours truly ,
zimah

; Spinning around my head

2009-10-16T00:11:00.003+08:00

New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There's nothin' you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York,
New York

I am running out of every faith and hope in me just like how I am running out of pictures . My mouth is seal shut this time . Let me play the cards and just pretend that nothing actually had happen . Though the insides are sinking , I got to pull myself together and think about all of the bright days ahead . Never ever thought that this will happen ; but it did .

All I can say is , practices has been good and I am dead tired . I can see myself lethargic during school hours but somehow today was good . Practical lessons was laid back , and I was happy enough that my lecturer was joyous . I wonder what was the occasion . *wonders* . My school had a event and due to that , half of my class entered the second class later than usual . Lab Maths and we touched on Indices . I was sitting next to Afiqah and I shared my piece of struggle . At that point of time , I wish I could actually break down and let it all off my shoulder . Lab Maths Tutorial ended super duper early , which was terrific .

Mood swings began to conquer my soul when I met my girls . I have to apologize deeply for that . Headed to Republic to have our practices . New choreography was difficult . After days of not meeting Baby , I finally get to meet him . Alhamdullilah . I was beyond ecstatic . Like I say , Alhamdullilah for that . I love him deep

To sum it all up ,
No I am still not happy .
and my mind will never stop pondering .
Like I mention ,
my mouth is seal-ed .
*long facial expression*

yours truly ,
zimah

; He got swagga right

2009-10-14T10:43:00.003+08:00

Finding someone isn’t about trying to transform yourself into the perfect image of what you think they want. It’s about being exactly who you are and then finding a person who appreciates that. For what I have learnt , infatuation is when you find somebody who is absolutely perfect. Love is when you realize that they aren’t and it doesn’t matter.

Flaws and all . I shall love you till the end .
This I promise you .

yours truly ,
zimah

p.s I miss pillars

; What you see

2009-10-14T07:16:00.003+08:00

Now I don't want to live without you
Can't be without you
Ever since I let you in the door
Boy I don't want to sleep without you
Can't breathe without you
I think I found what I've been waiting for

When my guards places its armour down , my inner demon was taking control of every part . However , the battle is at its end , and positivity has hail itself as victorious in this struggle . I have so much thank yous to the people around me for actually being part of this mini war I had within myself . My Pillars who stood still and shelter me from pain was there all along , and I am truly bless about it .

I agree that my day and nights of yesterday was something unforgettable and I know how hard I cried . I place myself to sleep earlier than what I use to in hopes of searching a perfect memory or a dream . Something in me told me to switch my phone to General mode , and miraculously I received a text message at 2.08 in the early hours . My eyes beam with joy and my heart sank , but not to sadness but with relief and much ecstatic . Switch my laptop on and video called with my precious Boyfriend .

Yes , it is already 7.32 in the morning and in such rare sight that I am blogging . Bottom line is , I am not in school because I am down with slight coughs and of course the consistent tummy aches that pauses my nerve system every now and than . I need ample of energy to pull through today as I will be having my practice at Republic Poly with the girls .

On a happy note , I am going to get myself all clean up and by 8.30 , I shall drag my light legs to the nearest shopping center and get breakfast for Mama , Raiyan , Cik Lin and myself . I am thinking of those delicious pancakes from MacDonald's . I guess having my period makes me crave on a lot of things and that is one of the awfully heavily fat-ed food that I am going to consume .

To sum it all up .
Prayers to the morning sky
I hope today is a good day .
Insyaallah .
and I sincerely miss , love and in need of my daily dosage of ;
boyfriend .

yours truly ,
zimah

; My little own story book

2009-10-13T16:15:00.004+08:00

Colours around me began to fade at every second that the world has given out . The life I had and currently is having has turn it's back on me and laugh at every step that I took and to mock me further , place my life on pause . My entire body system is failing on me , shutting down the switches in me one at a time . My fight for survival and existance ; yet I do not know how to do so .

The pressure is taking its toll on me . My temperature is rising . My tummy is making one lot of pain , and I am crying ; sinking every tear drops to my pillow . Every bones in me , shaking and I do not feel myself no more . However , in this chapter , I will not give out any details on what happen because I foresee something better in the future and I and the figure will overcome this . Insyaallah .

To end off . School is a major no-no for me at this point of time . I have been falling sick and have been heading off early for the past two days of school . I learnt that I have 3 modules and I feel that life is hectic and full with doubts . I see a need to tell you that I might not be blogging so frequently as of now .

To sum it up ,
I love you
insyaallah .
praying .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Questions

2009-10-10T16:17:00.004+08:00

You left a mark
I wear it proudly on my chest
Above my heart
To Remind me that I feel the best
When I'm with you

My heart begins to wander whenever my brain starts sending signals about my second semester in school . Obviously , I am really keen in learning new elements and of course meeting my well miss classmates , BUT having to realize that this semester I will have Lab Maths which applies Algebra and so much other topics makes me slightly nervous about my whole 9 weeks of school . I am questioning about how well will I go this round , and many others too . I seriously hope I can pull through . However , I do think that the time table is one step closer in taking away my breath and my life . Such torture . Basically here is how we go . Click to enlarge

Monday 8am-5pm
Tuesday 8am-5pm
Wednesday 8am-6pm
Thursday 9am-430pm
Friday 9am-11am

On another note , I was glad enough that I get to meet Baby once my practice was over . Heading Underground with the girls was pleasant . The girls went off buying food while I head down to Underground first . Upon seeing him , my heart flutter with excitement and I hugged him . How truly miss by me . Spent a couple of hours with Emerged and watching them practice . My respect goes out to them , their tricks are scary but awesome . Emerged and my girls walk towards City Hall Mrt together whereby I bid goodbye to everyone , and some how Dinah and Sasha got excited seeing some action between me and Baby *rolls eyes and giggles*

By night , I got myself occupied with YOville and thinking about Baby . It pains me deeply because his pre-paid is down . After which I got a call from an unfamiliar number . Some dude wants to get to know me , and my drift and routine is always the same , I'll give my favourite catch line of not tolerating people passing my numbers and bla-de-bla-de-bla AND finally I found out that it was Baby *huge smiles* , he was using JR's phone (thanks JR) . I love you deep deep . Had a quite a long talk with Baby and Zad *eyebrows do the wave* . You know , He know , I know , Dinah know =D .

To sum it all up .
Currently am missing Baby ,
still have the pinch about my time tables .
I loathe it so very much
=(

yours truly ,
zimah

; Yo ville

2009-10-08T21:23:00.004+08:00

This boyfriend of mine , introduce me to this really addictive game called ; Yo Ville . After a few struggles , we finally had the same server and I can see him , and he can see me ; our characters are super glamorous . Therefore , at the end of the day , we decided to turn Boyfriend's place to our place . Long story short , our money are shared and we spent a few items , so this is what our bedroom looks like =D

I cinta you banyak banyak !

yours truly ,
zimah

; I have an option

2009-10-08T14:18:00.003+08:00

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

I do not know what I am feeling ; but it is never a good vibe . My hands are shaking , my mind is pondering and my soul is wondering . I know that it was the past , but if you know me long enough , you know how I go . Bumping the edges of negativity is always a routine for me , so I can never really help feeling this way . I did tear up , and compare myself to the past figure . I know I am stronger than this , but the feelings are too defensive and would not let my inner angels have a war with the abyss . Why now ?

I'm officially

scared

yours truly ,
zimah

; the point of it all

2009-10-08T12:11:00.002+08:00

Every time you look my way
I realize more and more
How much I adore those pretty eyes
Of yours, I'm helpless baby

At the back of my mind , I can foresee thousands of students all over Singapore cheering or to an exaggerating level , they are shouting with jubilation . I can foresee that books and notes are being launched in the air and will slowly fall to the ground pieces by pieces , bit by bit . So with that , I will like to wish every of those who took their 'N' level this past month , good luck with the results but for now , you deserve a huge breather . Have countless of awesome time and fun with your love ones . Your battle is over . Congratulations for making through it ; now go and relax .

On a second note , I have to apologize to My Pillars due to the fact that I cannot go out today . I have been eliminating my time at home this days and Abah is for sure angry about how late I always arrive home . Therefore , today I will just bench out , I really do hope you have fun . Girls outing right *smiles*

On another note , Dearest Boyfriend is stuck in my brain shell . Thinking of him makes me smile and thinking of him just makes me realize how truly bless I am . Wednesday is awesome . You and I both know about that . Apologies if I made your ears red *giggles* . It's hard because your prepaid is down , and it feels weird not texting you in the early morning . However , I guess I shall wait for you to be online . I love you Baby , you mean everything to me . Plus the talks about the future excites me . I'll pray for it , for us and our future *smiles* . You know I know (wicket wicket)

To sum it all up
Thursday will be a bore
hopefully Friday will be glorious .
I miss my boyfriend
my pillars
classmates .
AND ANYONE UP FOR NAUGHTY G ?
*giggles*
random-cosity

yours truly ,
zimah

; because I love you too deep

2009-10-07T00:13:00.002+08:00

You gave me a reason
Told me that I'll always be yours.
You are my desire
My heart is so on fire for you
I can't stop lovin ya

Alhamdullilah , all praises to Allah for blessing me with such a splendid day . It feels that somehow , my tummy had place itself on self function mode and it actually widens my consumption storage space . All the houses that I went today , was spread with delicious food and I was tempted to just try everything . However , at the end of the day , the company I had was marvelous and I love every single one of them . Though , I went off early , I still had countless of massive fun with my dearest classmates . Take my word that I will post them pictures as soon as I get them .

Met my dearest boyfriend and Emerged and I must say , their new routine is a killer . Watch out for that . Me and dearest went to MacDonald's to get a large Ice Milo for our self and that was when I bump into half of ARziLAHmi . Such coincidence . I have to thank dearest for sending me off to the bus stop and even spend like a quarter of its journey with me . I love you for that . Honestly , having him in my life is such a blessing .

I have a full-dress rehearsal tomorrow and I am nervous . I am still thinking IF I should add a couple of new routines I did a couple of days back OR if I should just stick to everything and do a proper one on the day of the competition itself . *wonders* . Dearest said that I should keep it , SO I guess I shall do just that .

I guess , I shall end it right here . Plus , both of my ears are bleeding . Yucks

To sum it all up ,
I miss everyone who is in my mind .

yours truly ,
zimah

; love you like i always do

2009-10-06T01:10:00.002+08:00

Baby , no more of that please .
But bottom line is .
I love you like I always do

Love is cinta

&

cinta is him

& btw

2009-10-04T23:52:00.003+08:00

Oh by the way ,

to those who are taking their N levels .
Best wishes from me to you .
ESP you ; Dinah , Afiq and Boyfriend

yours truly ,
zimah

; some people would never stop

2009-10-04T21:17:00.002+08:00

So leave it behind ’cause we, have a night to get away,
So come on and fly with me, as we make our great escape.
So baby don’t worry, you are my only,
You won’t be lonely, even if the sky is falling down,
You’ll be my only, no need to worry

I believe that with every day that I spent , I can actually write a book-long filled with maelstrom
of emotions on different pages . I figure that not all days will end up euphoric and on jubilation avenue . You see , when the nights are closing in and a new day awaits , there is bound to be a twist in my personal book . Personally , I begin to understand the whole concept of my life bit by bit . Though moments may be rough , but I have all the choices in the world ; either to make me happy or be affected by it .

Days might be rough but I know when I fall , those hands are there to support me . Life has taught me patience , and when news befall me , my usual and current routine will be letting a huge sigh and mutter a small prayer so that Allah could actually open up their shallow heart and minds . I truly stand by this quote saying ; no one is perfect . Therefore , I am not blaming them for having a third eye upon my flaws . I just wish that everything was serene and in peace . I too question myself on why am I too soft hearted , and like what my pillar told me , people start stepping on my head because they know I would never react . Honestly , though my heart is breaking , I will never ever forget about the one above for he is the one who created ME , THEM and everyone . So if they speak filth about my name , they are actually questioning the creation of Allah .

But for now , I would love to accept the fact that I am surrounded by beautiful angels . My pillars , ARziLAHmi (note that Helmi is part of my favourite people in school . Thank you for always being there) , My family and last but not least , my incredible boyfriend . Like I said earlier , though I may fall , I know this hands are there to lift me up and give me support .

To sum it all up .
My soul is at peace .
Ipod is with boyfriend .
but the main thing is
I love him

yours truly ,
zimah

; All mine

2009-10-03T23:45:00.004+08:00

2 years , I've been patiently waiting
for the right guy who can get my heart racing ,
you got to be first in line , to take that place
Navigate your way through , because my love is like a maze .
You flaunt your style , your moves
I can't take my eyes off you .
Even me myself and I can't believe it is true .
How can a guy like you make me believe in love once more .
Because the past had haunted me , and I am damaged by the one before .

Morning turns to night ,
and I'm thinking about you all the time .
Those sweet dates we had , are like a treasure ,
that was once hard to find .
But
I thank God for taking this pain away ,
because now ,
I won't be counting the stars alone today .
Babyboy , you change my life .
I guess without you here ,
I can't survive .

I did this a couple of years back . I guess , FINALLY , I can finish it all up *smiles*

To sum it up ,
today was good and bad .
No worries
I am still rocking that shit
and I love boyfriend .
and my tummy is bloated

yours truly ,
zimah

; I love you

2009-10-02T15:53:00.004+08:00

Look in my eyes
Take a good look tell me what you see
Because of you
I'm only a fraction of the woman I used to be

I didn't want to fall in love
I didn't really have the time
I didn't want to let you in my life
I wanted to run and hide

Now I don't want to live without you
Can't be without you
Ever since I let you in the door
Boy I don't want to sleep without you
Can't breathe without you
I think I found what I've been waiting for

The smile on my face
Tells I'm exactly at the place that I want to be
Boy you're like my fire
You're my one and only desire
You can have everything that you want from me

Baby I'm going through it
I really don't know what you did
But I'm glad you did it
I never thought I would feel this way
But I'm so with it
All things are possible
And with that we'll fall together

I know what I've been waiting for
And it's you

yours truly ,
zimah

p.s SASHA is in Mama's room and we are chatting through MSN . PANDAI KAN KITER =D

; Be jealous

2009-10-02T12:38:00.003+08:00

I've got some issues that nobody can see
and all of these emotions are pourin' outta me
I bring them to the light for you
it's only right
this is the soundtrack to my life

Alhamdullilah , I finally feel like I have received a wonderful needed sleep that I long eons ago . The first thing I could ever think off was Baby's shawl and it was safely hugged beside me , and the second thing was , I am craving for Sardine-O . Random-cosity I know right *smiles* . Mama bought me Prata for breakfast which I have yet to touch on due to the fact that I have not hit the showers yet . I will be heading to the Studio at 4 with the girls , to practice and to do a draft mix of tomorrow's performance . I am nervous , but Insyaallah we will do good .

On a random note , the night before was scary . Since Abang has been asking me to switch off the room lights , I reluctantly did so because I was video calling with Baby . So this smart Alex brain of mine decided to go sit all by myself at the Dining Room . Picture this , pitch dark but the only lights that accompanied me was the lights provided right above me . I was having a good time with Baby , his laugh , his smile ; everything . Not until , a conversation pops up PLUS this happened at 2 in the morning .

Baby : B , Mama wake up already ?
Me : No la everyone is sleeping .
Baby : Than who was that behind you in white .
Me : *looks behind* Where got
Baby : I swear I saw a white thing
Me : *shows my palm asking him to wait , and pick up my laptop and ran to my room*

It was hilarious at the same time , but than again , I was off lenses SO I could not see a thing . Therefore , better be safe than sorry right . I tuck myself in bed , smell Baby's shawl and drifted to my sleep , and the next morning I told Abah about me video calling Baby and what he saw . Abah laugh at me . Eleh action pulak Abah ni *giggles*

To end off , you see this beautiful lady above . Yes that is my sister . Be jealous . I love her to micro bits and the feelings of miss is equivalent to the grains of sand at Siloso Beach . She has not been feeling well plus her exams are already here , so therefore , she needs to take good care of herself and of course ace on her End of Year . I have full faith that she will do well because she has potential ; both studies and dance . I love you Adik once more . Need your silly presence in my and the other Pillars life as soon as possible . If you are available please dial 1800-I-MISS-SYIQY-KENTOT to reach to either one of us *giggles*

To sum it all up .
Happy day I suppose
since I am meeting Pillars

yours truly ,
zimah

; wrap you around me

2009-10-02T00:19:00.004+08:00

Put your arms around me boy,
I got something to show you, tonight.
And you know I need your undivided attention baby.
Aint no other girl, can rock your world like I

Deep inside , I feel a sugar rush and I am beaming with joy . The sight of that item and the smell of it makes me euphoric . How thankful I am to have him in my life . I dare to say , he is already a part of me and most definitely a figure in my journey . The day with him was splendid . I made my way to Pasir Ris . Alhamdullilah for having a bus to cater to my destination .

After which off we went Yishun to meet Kev and his girlfriend . Than we made our way to Woodlands to meet my girls and Afiq and than finally to our destination ; Republic Polytechnic . Had practice and everyone was anxious waiting for Abang Jamyl's arrival . Kev and his girlfriend made their way home . I love the fact that Baby stick by me through out . Zad , Fauzie and Azlan came later that night , and the place was in chaos . Once everything was done , I made my way home with Baby and Zad .

Baby , I love you so much .
Remember teach me krump and I shall give you something
*kening naik naik*

To sum it all up ,
I am having a jolly good time .
F you haters .

Have a nice night Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; Into a different dimension

2009-10-01T06:44:00.003+08:00

I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go
Stop breathing if I don't see you anymore

Initially , I had every intention to write an entry filled with words the night before , but something in me that was much more important interfered with the plans . Therefore , I shall narrate and entry right about now . Alhamdullilah , I just perform my Subur and now I cannot place myself to bed .

On another note , I went home rather late last night but my train rides was seriously distracted by a couple of issues banging in my head . I strike some of them off but a particular situation got me pondering for hours . I swear that I could actually just break down right there , but I knew I was stronger than that . How silly at times to actually realize that some people have a date with their contradicting words . It is seriously a funny situation whereby a person says a million and one words at a pace that is unknown to men without reflecting the million and one words to themselves . But than again , all this are test from God to me and to the ones effected . Alhamdullilah , let them keep going . My defenses are on a all time high , no matter what you do , there is no way you can break me or shake me . Plus . my sins are slowly being cleared away with every word you spit about me . With that , I thank you .

Side track , my results will be out today via SMS and to be honest I feel the slight pinch of anxiety kicking through my system . I too will be having my practices later on . The last song for a performance is in the midst of choreographing . I feel that I have a serious urge to go back to my Secondary School and pick up a few tips from Mr.Desmond . I know such random-cosity . To add on , my insecurities are back on . Just as I thought that it was dying down . I got to keep hanging on . Fight till my last breath .

To end off , I had this surreal and peculiar dream . My soul was being dragged by a lady . In a way , she was possessing me and would love to take control of my body . I was fighting to overcome and I was struggling . It felt so real , and when my eyes flash wide open , I was drenched in fear .

To sum it all up .
Insyallah .
Today will be a good day .
Waiting for Baby's text .

Have a nice Thursday Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; Lost

2009-09-29T23:33:00.004+08:00

They heard I was good, they wanna see if it's true
They know you're the one I wanna give it to
I can see you want me too
Now it's me and you

The night is going to end bitter , and all I wish for right now is to trace my steps to the balcony and lay down . I know the peaceful night will be my best company for what I am feeling right now . I cannot express how I feel this very instant . I am nauseous and mixed at the same time . My body is shivering with something that I can recognize ; fear . What is wrong with me .

A few minutes ago , I could feel half of my soul slowly sucking out and I was sinking deep into the abyss . Rolling a couple droplets , and let it crash on my pillows . I feel to say the least pathetic in every single way . My words turn its back on me , and I felt like I was in the losing end . I felt like giving myself a tight slap ; for my pain's pleasure . I was unsure with my surroundings and I hate the feeling .

My whole mind is not at ease over that particular scene . I hope I shall recover the next day . Honestly , I have to thank god for having my practice tomorrow . You know , I have always loved dance practices because it helps me express who I am as a person , and what I am feeling as a whole . Some things in life , are too deep to calculate and sum it all up in sentences , but with dance , I can do just that .

To sum it all up .
Once a pillar always a pillar .
No matter how sneaky it was .
I thank her for that unsuspecting move .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Tears of joy

2009-09-29T02:14:00.002+08:00

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

The night is streaming by slowly and before I know it , morning will chirp me awake . Yes , it is currently 2.20 in the morning and I am definitely still up . Having a total awesome chat with my cousin Bee , I truly miss her presence in my life . She knows what days have been , and I sincerely apologize . I hate myself for doing all those things . I hope she forgives my sins . To add on , I am messaging Baby . An emotional one .

Today was the day whereby I spill out my problems and what my mind is thinking at him . I love his support and the advice he gave me ; asking me to be strong and have strength and faith with my passion . He too gave me a fair share of his life , and I am thankful that he actually shares his problems with me . In a way , I feel that I know him better and what is he dealing with . I promise you Baby , whatever I said to you is true . *smiles* . Honestly , the topics were touch on , is really deep , and at the end of the day , I have to send my thanks to the one above for having you in my life .

I guess I am heading to bed .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Ignoring

2009-09-28T23:47:00.003+08:00

You`re just like poison
Slowly moving through my system
Breaking all of my defenses with time
You`re just like poison and i just don`t get it
How can something so deadly feel so right?

Today was a brilliant day for me to scream a thousand and one profanities in the air . Catching Phobia 2 with Dinah , Sasha , Hasween and Naufal was the best . The whole movie was to me worth watching , despite the fact that I hid my face beneath Hasween's arm and covered my ears the whole entire time . There were 5 parts to the movie and the last one was extremely funny , I guess you should catch it to understand what I mean .

The night was splendid . I truly miss my Baby and I guess when it comes to him , traveling means nothing . My heart beat faster when I saw him , that was how much I miss him on the real . Baby , you mean the world to me and I love you and I love you for taking time to meet me sayang .

Cab home due to the fact that I was lethargic and exquisitely drained . Plus Dinah , Sasha and myself found out new details . It was hilarious for me because I could see this was coming , but I was just waiting for the time . I myself will never ever pin point who is at fault , I guess things like this , everyone was in the wrong . I just wish and hope , everything was back to what it was before . Insyaallah . I truly guess that with our respective schedules , time was being such a bitch to us .

To sum it all up ,
today was good
Alhamdullilah .
To syiqy ,
how is your pantat ?
and get well soon

yours truly ,
zimah

; annoying bitches

2009-09-28T01:09:00.002+08:00

i think about you i think about me i think about us together
i think of your eyes lookin in mine
and im better...better
this world's too much for me to take
come give me some some sweet escape
get next to me come close to me wrap hold on me

My fatigue body finally sigh a huge breather once both of my legs touches the cold hard floor that I call home . It was already midnight and Abah , Bik Jai and myself just came back from Race Day . To me , the adrenaline rush of the event is seriously beyond fantastic . Like I say , the smell of burnt tires just gets to me .

Thank you Abah for buying me that MacLaren shirt . I was ecstatic to the deepest and I could not express in words how stoked I was . To add on to my happy mood , Lewis Hamilton clinch first place and it is his 11Th win . Alhamdullilah . My heart race when his car slowly zooming pass my area whereby he and the other drivers waved at the spectators . Even if he has that helmet on , I could not believe that I was that close to anak-TON-tengah-HAMIL *smiles*

On a rough note , my night is going to end with a slight twist . I have been fighting with couple of issues in my head , and take it this way , I am going to laugh it all off . As much as how annoying the facts is , I have to deal it with positivity , because I know I live and I learn , and I learn that it is never to good to hold any grudges . I thank god for blessing me with Patience because at the end of the day , he who had the last scream will have the embarrassment right smack in his face . If the party would want to continue the cold war , so be it . Like I say , I am going to laugh it all off

To sum it all up
I miss My pillars
ARziLAH
& boyfriend

yours truly ,
zimah

; You mean the world to me

2009-09-27T01:23:00.002+08:00

Ohh, and I ain't never been this way
Grab my body baby
Hold my heart, don't break it

My heart sank when I hear about a situation a dear friend of mine is in . I do not ever think that she is deserving enough to go through all this by herself . Her days are bitter , and I can never accept the fact that she is in the circle . However , I make a promise to myself and to her ; I will be there for her every single second of her life . Because I shall gladly cater my attention to the person whom I regard as a sister .

On a random note , I guess it is human nature to think and visualize our life with someone we truly love , however on the flip side , we are blinded by our own reality that we are seriously soaked in and forget the fact that MAYBE just MAYBE the other party is not feeling what you are feeling . All I am saying is , I have been that type . Letting opportunities come and go . But I guess , the final one came and I took that chance and the bottom line is , I am truly bless and happy . I guess life journey even if there are bitter moments , it is all worth the learning .

Finally , my down-graded handphone has changed its tune to I'm At War by Sean Kingston because it reminds me of Baby . I love you .

To sum it all up .
F1 Race day today .
Anticipating !

yours truly ,
zimah

; I'll be your sunshine

2009-09-26T18:52:00.004+08:00

I'm at war with the love of my life
Sweat from my brows runnin down to my eyes
Everything you are is what I need in my life

A close pillar of mine said to me ; If your man leaves his phone on the table . It means that he has nothing there to hide . I guess it is normal for any human being to have his or her doubts but I truly think that my insecurities is sinking slowly . Trust and patience , I have to always keep that in mind .

On a brighter note , F1 with the girls was beyond superb . We were giving faceless expressions and whenever that Yellow Helmet Maclaren driver zoom pass us , DIziSHAH (as said as Karel *giggles*) scream like the whole place was ours . In case you are wondering who is the driver with the Yellow Helmet , well he is none other than , anak-TON-tengah-HAMIL . We were stoked despite how loud the volume was . I love the smell of burnt tires on the tracks , I am anticipating for Race Day to come . My wish is to get that earphones with radio built on . That is my current wish .

Spending time with the girls have its unique and bizarre moments . We were having an all out Monopoly Deal session and finally , I got to win a game . Dinah and Sasha was my source of laughter for the night . How could they actually stumble and fall when the steps were visible . My tummy was ticklish , I could not suppress my laughter for the night . Everything was to me , perfect . The company , the ambiance ; everything . I would love to have one more of these some days too .

To end off , SHOUT OUT TO EMERGED . Happy one year anniversary guys and girls . May God bless your crew with never ending success and happiness . *In god's willing*

To sum it all up ,
I am seriously drained
Did not even catch my needed sleep .
Once I reached home , jump on my bed .
PLUS
Sasha was being cruel !
Web cam me when I was sleeping ,
and she said that I speak nonsensical stuff .
I wonder .

yours truly ,
zimah

; It's yours

2009-09-25T10:21:00.002+08:00

good friends will bail you out of jail
best friends will be sitting next to you saying
that was awesome!

I realize that I had so much to do yet I was given such an insufficient amount of time . When I was preparing for bed , a long list of pending jobs awaits me . I was lethargic enough and I could not spare a few minutes with my laptop , so I have decided to strike it all one by one the very next morning . Body system was alerted when Abang's annoying alarm clock began to filled the serene air . He was still enjoying his sleep while I was struggling to hide beneath the warm comforters , yet it was unsuccessful . My last resort was , to smash my pillow right in his face *giggles* .

I recall that it was 7 in the morning and I gave a text to Baby , asking him to wake me up at 8 . I bet that he laughed at what I said because I was asking for an hour of sleep . However , this Baby of mine is so good to me , because he actually gave me extra 26 minutes of sleep . He called me , and I was damn fatigue to even reach out to my phone . Well , I hate my voice in the morning , sounds so sluggish .

I will be having my rehearsals at 3pm today . Supposedly it was scheduled at 12 but I have to wait for my Aunt to come back from her check-up , therefore the timings were being pushed . I cannot wait for my Performing Arts rehearsals on the 7Th of October , because I get to meet my fellow school mates of ; Applied Health Sciences . Well I am nervous about the competition itself , but I guess a breather or two will do the trick .

Not going to lie , my tummy is in full of pain . That is what you get when you drink Milk in the morning zimah . Mama cook-ed Nasi Briyani today and I guess I will be helping myself to it before I am heading out with the girls . And , YES , I have added one more song into my player . It's call , I'm yours by J Holiday . I love it . Plus a video that he made makes me LAUGH and smile .

To sum it all up ,
insyaallah
today will be a good day .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Days

2009-09-24T23:26:00.004+08:00

when worse comes to worst;
my girls come first!

Currently , video calling with Baby . Alhamdullilah everything is fine . I can now sigh a huge breather . I love you Baby , and I love My Pillars as well . I know we are not complete , but our thoughts and heart goes out and speaks of their name every single minute and seconds of our lives . You know who you are , we apologize deeply to you . We miss you and that is not a lie .

My mind is empty and my stomach is too . Going to grab supper later on . F1 tomorrow with the girls . I seriously wish I could duplicate the tickets and bring all of My Pillars along . My apologies once more . I feel so down just thinking about this .

Anyway , videos are up on Facebook and here comes the pictures . So enjoy .

To sum it all up ,
I love everyone .
Period

yours truly ,
zimah

; the perfect words

2009-09-24T06:20:00.002+08:00

If you're rolling, know how much I need you
Every day
In every way
Got me baby, so addicted to you

I am accompanied by serene at this very morning . No spot on reason can ever answer my question on why am I awake at this very time . The clock glared back and it screams 6.22 in the morning . My body system is fatigue yet my eyes refuse to co-ordinate itself with my body and soul . Call me silly , but I actually held close my phone and read all of Baby's message . From day one to now and I realize something .

Many came in my life . Some who stayed , and some left resulting in me getting hurt with every door that I open . For once , I became a knuckle head ; afraid to meet new people and showed no interest in all this whole drama . However , when he came into my life . It feels like my world is revolving , he makes me happy in a way that I can never put it into words .

Up to now , I truly believe that I am falling deeper and deeper . Every single day , I love him extra more than what it was the day before . Video calling him was always a good experience for me , because I miss him . Just to see his smile , makes me turn into that girl who use to play Barbie when she was small . Just to see him fooling around with my young one makes me chuckle with amusement on how adorable he was . Distance can never be a reason to ever make this relationship falter . For him , I know I would jolly well travel just to be near him .

Loving someone takes a lot of patience , trust and understandings . It was not a simple task to begin with . With that , a few hiccups along the road seem unavoidable but with this ordeal , it test us in many ways . Yesterday , it felt like I lost half of me . My girls know who hard I cried . I have never been the girl who sees the brighter side of life but I guess with him , I shall learn that and I shall never ever put myself in that situation ever again .

Baby , I love you and I dare to say ; you are the best boy in my life fore sure . No questions ask

To sum it all up
No I am not going to sleep
-__-
I have dance practice at 3.30pm
and I have to finish up a song that Mira wants me to write
Insyaallah ; keeping my faith up
plus to Sasha and Dinah
our nights are bitter , but it will get better

Have a nice morning Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; don't know what to do

2009-09-23T22:09:00.003+08:00

Baby I love you
You are my life
My happiest moments weren't complete
If you weren't by my side

My heart is aching . My head is seriously confuse . My world is spinning and tumbling and I was not even ready to fall . I love compiling all the facts and decipher it slowly . That is me , and if the decisions seemed so frail and rash , I have myself to blame . Not prolonging the matter further , I got better and awesome memories to run back too .

Blame me for being so careless . My key was left under Mama's care and I could not get out from the house . However , I am thankful enough that my girls came over . We change a few songs here and there . Did our positions , I guess it is serioulsy easy doing positions for 3 people only . I admit , my house might not be huge or wide , so therefore , accidents happen . Funny ones indeed .

I have posted a video on Facebook . The edits are damn simple because I am still learning about the Movie Maker . Takes one step at a time . Syiqy can be a very good actress when she grows up , I swear .

...
..
.

I apologize deeply to you . I never should have me take control of me . NEVER . Sincerely , I need you . I do . I still do and I still will . You mean the world to me and why is this happening . I should have believe you . I really should , but what is wrong with me . From the start , I knew myself the most . I knew I would suck in all this relationships , I should have listen to myself . I should . What is wrong with me ? Ya allah , I thank you for blessing me with great days , and tonight I have tasted on the other side . I hope this won't last long . I love you baby , and there is nothing in this world that can take away from me , my heart and my soul .

Have a nice sleep Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; Just a kiss

2009-09-23T13:43:00.002+08:00

never settle for less than you deserve
find the one who makes you happy and never let go.

Superb Tuesday ; that is my definition of yesterday . I got my pillars with me and I got my baby over the other side of Singapore video calling us . Sasha bought two tubs of ice cream and till now we did not even finish it up . We played Monopoly Deal and I have to say , my luck is wearing thin on me . Rafidah almost wipe us out on every single game . I guess , Dinah's lucky charm star is not working on her too *giggles*

Time went by and we were bored , so I asked them if they would love to do something new ; making a video and sharing it to our lovely friends . So we shared like a zillion videos (exaggerating much) , and we were purely having loads of fun laughing at our impromptu scripts . The girls seriously made my day BUT than again , good things must come to an end . My girls went home and I was really happy that I am still video calling baby .

I guess Raiyan loves and adore his "abang" so much . He can easily think of a conversation to pop out with him when I am busy doing some stuff . You may never know what this little kid said to him when I was away . It feels like Raiyan made a connection with him and it feels like they have known one another for a long time . *giggles* . I guess I am hiding my feelings but , my heart was beaming with joy whenever I see him smiling . I have no clue why . Baby , I love you . Period

To sum it all up ,
days have been good .
Alhamdullilah
No words can express how I feel towards
baby .
My pillars .
My family .
&
ARziLAH

Have a brilliant day Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; Sweet lullaby

2009-09-22T02:08:00.003+08:00

I wish that when I wake up you're there
To wrap your arms around me for real
And tell me you'll stay by side

The festive season has arrived and I was truly contented that I met all of my family members . I realize that I lost touch upon a lot of details on my paternal side . My heart beam with joy when I saw that familiar face . Yes , I am talking about Shikin . I gave her a tight hug and if I could , I would kiss her right on her face . *giggles* . The place was chill out , I saw my grand-father and I wanted to shed a tear . Normal routine for my feelings to pop up whenever I glance on his figure and pale complexion .

Maternal side has always been an awesome awesome time . The house was fully packed , and there was a lot of small cousins running around . I am so in love with the surrounding . I believe that I actually pinched all of my little cousins . Their cheeks are my victims and I shall leave no mercy for them ; AT ALL . When the soccer match began to start , I hurriedly grab a sit right in front of the television . Grand-dad was next to me and he was fussing about a lot of stuff . I LOVE HIM FOR THAT . Alhamdullilah , at the end of the day , despite having our hearts beat at a very fast pace , we managed to clinch 3 points . I have to admit , the game was TOUGH .

On a lighter note , I have to say that Ram kenneth Cruz is truly miss and love by me . The best boy in my life for sure , and I have a surprise gift for him . But apparently the item will be ship out and will be in my hands next two weeks . Patience . Baby , must teach me how to Krump ok *giggles* . Sincerely , I love you . period

To sum it all up .
Alhamdullilah my days are glorious and shiny .
I am happy and contented .

Have a nice night Singapore
P.S WE ARE HEROES ARE SO GOING TO WIN ABDC SEASON 4 .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Hari Raya

2009-09-19T23:56:00.002+08:00

As a human , I know that the term "perfection" may not exist in my dictionary . And as I grow up , I learn that words are like plagues ; it spreads fast and is really dangerous . Words can actually do a whole lot of damage and hurting people feelings is a violation code to any humans . Without further ado , (alright before hand I would like to apologize as my words will be solely written in English . So bare with me .) I would like to say .

Dearest Pillars . My blood sisters and my everything . We know what we do to one another and we know that at the end of the day , it was all fun and love . However , I do would love to express my apologies if I have ever made any wrong doings towards any of you . The things I said which may come up as harsh and I do not realize it , I deeply send my apologies . You know I have no intention to hurt any of you , hurting you people is like hurting myself . My DNA is the same as yours . To end it all up , Hari Raya is here and I certainly cannot wait to meet my other respective Mama's and Abah's .
Girlfriends . You most definitely know who you are . At the end of the day , that one friendship that I will never ever forget ; is the friendship I built with each and everyone of you . I would also like to send my Apologies if my words may appear harsh and rash in some of the times . I love you all to bits and pieces and I too cannot wait for our outings
ARziLAH and Helmi . The 3 people who supported me with my passion . I must say , having you around is a life changing experience . I know what I have been through and I express what I went with you 3 . Alhamdullilah , you manage to catch me when i was falling . However , I do would like to express my huge apologies if I have ever speak a word or do anything that might hurt your feelings . Do forgive me

I guess that is all .
The major 3 aspects in my life plus my family of course .

To sum it all up ,
I foresee a bright day ahead .

Rest well Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; I ever had

2009-09-19T18:50:00.004+08:00

a friend is:
one who knows us, but loves us anyway.

Before hand , I would love to make a confession ; my entry will be seriously random and kind of short . Well , a few silly things and moment happened yesterday but mostly the one who was making all of the scene was ME . However , Sasha did a fair share of silly antics as well . So here are two scenes that she did .

Scene number one :
Sasha was queuing up to order our dinner with Dinah . With full of confidence , she sent a flying butt kick to her supposedly victim Dinah . After realizing that Dinah showed no pain nor any facial expression , Sasha sensed something amiss . Suddenly a hot caucasion man's voice arose from behind . He said "excuse me" , so than this slow and my sayang girl realize that she actually sent that butt kick to that guy . So she apologizes and was laughing with Dinah by than .

Scene number two :
Walking to catch the bus at the Skate Park . After purchasing that sleek shades . We walked towards the traffic lights . When the Green Man flash right before our very eyes , myself and Dinah was walking as per normal when we realize Sasha was not with us . Because you want to know why ? This sayang girl of mine actually did not realize that she had to step down before walking on the path and so the bottom line was , SHE FELL =)

ok I know random
and you see la , I got menses .
bad timing
*laughs*

Have a nice Saturday Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; I'm with the best

2009-09-19T13:39:00.005+08:00

love is as much of an object as an obsession,
everybody wants it, everybody seeks it, but few ever achieve it,
those who do will cherish it, be lost in it, and among all, never, never forget it

I had an awesome back to back dates with my love ones . I cannot ask for anything more . Truly am contented with where the direction of my life is going forward too . No more turning back and pondering about what could have been better , or what could have been changed . No more of that . I shall use this phrase into practice ; we must be willing to let go of the life we have planned , so as to have the life that is waiting for us .

Even if the plan was in a way moulded into the opposite path , 3 is definitely was not a very bad idea after all . Although we wish we could have the presence of our other Pillars as well but we got to understand that they have other major things to do . In a way , I was laughing non-stop and like I say , they are both my favourite girls and I feel seriously comfortable talking and sharing with them . In my eyes , they are already like my blood sisters , and nothing less than that . So we walked almost everywhere and than , Dinah spot some cool shades that she would love to purchase , and it was damn sleek .

We than rest our fatigue legs at Heeran's Macdonald where we chose to break our fast at . While waiting for the time to clock us by , we decided to take pictures after pictures . At that point of time , I was busy text messaging Silly Boy so that explains WHY I appear to always have my phone in my hands all the time . We all had student meals , and I could not finish up mine . My appetite is decreasing I tell you .

More pictures is up on Facebook already . I got a text and after we head down to Far East to get Dinah's gorgeous heels for Hari Raya , we went down to Haji Lane . My very first time being there so I was literally locking arms with Dinah the whole time .

The night ended up splendid-ly and I am bless to spend my time with both of my beautiful sisters . My heart loves the other 3 of you as well . Only Sasha and Dinah knows the whole situation . Let's keep this down low , but than again . I miss that Silly Boy .

Have a nice day Singapore .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Maybe it's too late

2009-09-18T14:59:00.004+08:00

<>Now we've been talking for a while;
And you got me tryin' to figure out
Boy I don't know what to say to you
But you got me feelin' some kind of way for you

Now I know I come off kinda shy
But it's hard to say what's on my mind
The chemistry we have is hard to find
But to find the right words it's going to take some time

And all I know is when we're together
No one can make me feel the way you do baby
I wish each moment can last forever
It's hard to explain the way I feel for you
I just can't find the words

You got me loosing myself
In what I'm trying to say
And it's so hard to fight it
Can't help but feelin' this way
And every time that I'm near you it's like my heart gets weak.
Feels like I'm loosing my breath makin' it hard to speak.

I just can't find the words

Blog at night .
Have a pleasant Friday Singapore

yours truly ,
zimah

; Looks can be deceiving

2009-09-17T23:05:00.003+08:00

after a while, you just want to be
with the person who never fails to make
you smile :)

A good feeling is seeping my soul every single moment . I cannot deny that I am pretty much happy about it . I guess the week was tough but my memory shares it spaces with the good and positive thoughts that I receive for the past two days . You know that kind of feeling whereby your whole body shivers with excitement and joy . Well , that is just exactly it . Alhamdullilah

Recently , I just finish up my Audition for my Performing Arts . The feedback's was great . Alhamdullilah . The teachers have been asking me why did I not join the school's Dance Club . I could not point out a definite answer but I just gave out a hearty laugh instead . Like I say , all in all , everything have been going smoothly .

Thursday is over and done with and I spent my time at Geylang . It is not a common place for me and I was actually struggling with the routes . Sasha can not believe her ears that Geylang to me is like a foreign country . *giggles* Moving on , I had the most delicious dinner over at Mr.Teh Tarik . However I could not finish up my noodles , and so did Hasween . We than made another round at Geylang and I bump into one of my favourite boys , my Abang Izal . Exchange numbers and seriously I miss him .

Met the family and here we go again . Another round of Geylang for me . Abah was getting dizzy with every step he takes . Very adorable of Abah . I was seriously sad that my phone died on me . I was thinking about a person the whole entire time , so when I finally step into the house I ran and switched on the laptop and I was damn happy . *smiles*

Friday is coming which means that I get to meet the people I love and adore the most . In addition , my awesome Kak Zeella .Rindu sangat sangat .

To sum it all up ,
patience does pay off .
Pray your prayers .
It will do good .
Insyaallah

Have a nice Friday Singapore .

yours truly ,
zimah

; Harder to breathe

2009-09-16T16:44:00.002+08:00

sometimes the only part of my life that makes sense
is the part i share with you

I am not breathing like I use too , so I am praying for this to get better . I would never would want my history of asthma to come and haunt me . I am breathing slowly through my mouth due to the fact that my nose is block-ed . What a great combination I must point out .

My young one is fast asleep on my bed . I could not help but to kiss him all the time . His cheeks are super irresistible . Even if he can be a little bit of a rascal some times , I adore and love him fully with all my heart .

To end off , I miss I . terribly
*sad face*

yours truly ,
zimah

; Hectic life

2009-09-16T15:08:00.004+08:00

Every night I go
Every night I go sneaking out the door
I lie a little more, baby I’m helpless

It just feels that my normal life has been put on pause and I was given such a limited time to adapt to the visible changes around me . Seriously , even if I try to stray away from the negative thoughts that accumulates to pressure , I tend to run back into that dark area no matter what . I have been a strong foundation and in their eyes , I was a perfect figure ; to stay in the building doing task assigned to me . I am fatigue

My plans made with ARziLAH went downhill as I was instructed to follow the rules . My young one is still under his Medical Leave and therefore he was under my care . However , after all this ordeal . I still have to send my thanks to Allah for the many blessings that he have showered me . I must say , having my Performing Arts Challenge Solo Audition held tomorrow is what I call a "perfect timing" . I want to just let loose and let the weight on my shoulders be free .

To add on to that , I will be meeting countless of the people whom my heart sends her desires too . So with that , I envision that my Thursday will go just as fine . I still need to finish up on my mix . I am not putting so much ideas and theme into it because it is just the Auditions . Perhaps on a later round I guess .

To sum it all up ,
Wednesday is such a bore and I am looking forward for ;
Thursday and Fridays .
Life is surprisingly hectic ,
only me , myself and I feels what I am feeling right now .
No one can understand it

Have a splendid Wednesday Singapore .

yours truly ,
zimah

; I got my remedy

2009-09-16T02:21:00.004+08:00

And I'm soaked in your love
And love is right in my path, in my grasp
And me and you belong

My head still lingers on some facts that I just decipher , and it is not cool at all . But honestly , I am truly stoked that the things that I am dealing with is something not loading on my shoulders , well not currently that is . The reason is because I have this one little person in my life who keeps me company and makes me happy when morning befalls our city .

Forever with her classic and historic Hindustan songs and dance moves , she never fails to make this gloomy yet happy young lady smile and be all cheerful . I swear , she is one of the best I ever had . My cousin , my crew mate , my sister , my best friend and most importantly ; my pillar .

And oh , I kill-ed the cockroach that was lingering in my room today . Sorry Mr Cockroach , your life had to end in an unpleasant manner . Sorry for squashing you with the thick dictionary . *giggles*

Sleep tight Singapore .
Do not let the cockroach linger you

yours truly ,
zimah

Finding the vibe

2009-09-15T22:59:00.004+08:00

the first time you fall in love it changes your life
& no matter how hard you try, the feeling never goes away

This may take some time ; for me to think , and for me to narrate with details on what I am experiencing right now . Though it is never a good vibe to begin with , I always knew of what is in store for me since day one . The things I put my heads on to solve are becoming shady and illusive , resulting in me letting it go and surrendering the situation to time .

I must say , Pressure has been a good companion to me lately . Cross patching every of my good thoughts and colliding them with the demons in me . Sentences are changed - mindset have been bullied . But , I figured and like I usually tell myself . I was never a figure on his life to begin with . Lately , the gullible thoughts that I have came up with has successfully find its answers . It feels like a game I use to play during primary school . With the usage of a ruler , draw out a line that matches the correct answer , and without fail , I manage to score them full . This is exactly how it feels .

No doubt . I feel a strange foreign object invading my space . But than again , like I say . I knew what is in store for me before I even place myself in that position . Currently , the sweet melodies of Trust by Keyshia Cole and Monica are creeping through my mind and the words that capture my whole alerted system was this .

I trust you.
I love you.
I want you.
I need you.
Baby, I breathe you.
Never leave you.
Life wouldn't be the same without you.

So , what now ?

...
..
.

On a brighter note , pillars have been the source of my life . They are on full time , and with that I am truly and amazingly bless . Just a couple of hours ago , Sasha and Syiqy crash over my place which made me turn into that silly girl I was before . I laugh-ed as hard as if it was my last . The simplest things that they do , seriously could crack me up and actually make my laughter go on and on and on . I honestly feel that , suppressing my contagious laughter was something impossible . Fire crackers was what we did during the night's end , and I felt like a foolish young girl twirling around that stick for Sasha to capture the awesome effects .

To sum it all up ,
today was fill-ed with maelstrom of emotions ,
that I cannot lie .
But I got to be strong and keep my faith up .
and p.s I have my solo audition in school on Thursday .

A peaceful night .
I wish and I hope .
Have a nice week Singapore .

yours truly ,
zimah